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You
have reached the Newsletter Archives of the Alpha
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explore our website click on the button labeled "Home". Alpha Omega Minutes – July 10, 1999 Gloria called the minutes to order.
Gloria sent a letter to Carol Beacroft about the library books. Our next meeting will be the annual cookout at Kathleen’s and Martins. Arrive from 1:00 on. There will be a group committee meeting at 2:00. Our speaker in Sept. will be an electrolysis. Oct. Beverly Rencher will be our international speaker. Cheryl wore the Alpha Omega T-Shirt for the S.O. Gloria showed us the one for the C.D. The Spice conference is this week. Cheryl and Matt and John and Joyce are going. Olena is still looking for stories. Sherry is still looking for recipes for the cookbook. We have registration forms for the Erie Lakeside Gala. Holiday En’ Femme is Nov. 11th. through the 18th. We need a speaker for Nov. The group library is in the back of the room. We talked about anyone going to a crossdressing conference or convention. We decided to pay $50 a person. Abby made the motion. Diane sec. motion passed. Diane Brennon did the 50/50. We are dropping the $5 changing room fee. Susie thanked Alpha Omega for participation in the Be All. Diane Brennon suggested we have an alternative meeting place on the west side. Several places were suggested. Lori introduced Ruth Ann who is new to our meeting. Lori will have Tri Ess membership forms at the next meeting. Gloria thanked Debbie for the Indian meal tonight. Tammy an Debbie will bring Lasagna to the Sept. meeting. The meeting was adjourned. The program was Hobby Night. Gloria collects Eagles. Sherry weaves baskets. She brought some of them to show. Debbie collects music books. She was in a Rock Band in High School and College. Elaine collects a lot of things. She brought her Tack Pin collection. She also sings. She sang In My Life. Joyce and Linda like to dance. They also belong to a inspirational group. Cheryl collects Gone With the Wind memorabilia and Coke memorabilia. Diane Vernon collects Laser Wild Life photographs. Ruth Ann collects baskets, tins movie figurines and cookie jars. Barb collects power tools ,records , old books, Campbell cups, clocks and candle holders. Tammy collects records, tapes, cds, and studies the Civil War. Karen has a Superman comic book collection. She stopped five years ago when they killed him. Diane Brennon Sci-Fi books and golf clubs. Lori liked boating on Lake Erie. Debbie and Linda collect Harley Davidson memorabilia. Gloria told us Kathleen collects Bells. Respectfully Submitted Elaine Benton Secretary/Treasurer
AN EDITORIAL Recently someone asked me if there was a particular dress code for meetings. This is a fairly common question for new people to ask, and so I will now point out what our current constitution says about conduct and decorum, and a few thoughts of my own. Article 1, Section 4, of the Alpha Omega Constitu-tion, states the following: "At all times, the chapter requires that all members conduct themselves in a lady-like or gentlemanly manner, whichever the case may be." Our dress code requires that attire shall always be appropriate to the gender being portrayed and that members refrain from wearing bizarre or unusual attire to meetings (unless there is a special occasion, and the chapter has noted to waive this ruling prior to the meeting in question). We do not want to draw attention unnecessarily to the chapter or our members. I hope this information is beneficial. What it boils down to is - If you're going to dress like a lady, then look and act like one; and if you're dressed as a gentleman, then look and act appropriately, as well. Normally, if asked by someone what to wear to a meeting, I will suggest wearing something that you might wear, say for going shopping at the Mall, or if you were having company in your home. I tell people to wear something comfortable so they can feel relaxed. As a social gathering, we ask that everybody be considerate of others in their words and actions. As CD's we are very fortunate to have a large number of women who attend our meetings and are friends. As CD's we may not have a lot of time to think about or work on our deportment (mannerisms, how we sit, how we walk, etc.), or on choosing comfortable, casual, and yet very feminine outfits as we see the women wear, so that we can be better at presenting ourselves. I believe the women in our group would be more than happy to point out clothing or make up tips, or ideas for hair styles or jewelry, or even on how we can look and act more lady-like, if we were only to ask them. Not too long ago I happened to catch part of a daytime talk show, and as it happens, there were some CD's on the program. I swear that everyone of them had on outfits that were so tight and so short that they just looked ridiculous. And, on top of that, they walked, or rather, swaggered across the stage like gorillas; and there wasn't a one of them that could keep their knees together or cross their legs without giving a view that was not one to behold. They were totally obnoxious; and I remember thinking that this sure wouldn't make anybody "stand up for CD rights" by watching these idiots. We can, however, at our meetings, other get -togethers, or at any time we may go out dressed, make sure that we do present ourselves with dignity, and consideration for others. It is a responsibility we have if we are to educate and help others understand us, and give us acceptance as human beings. So I have a challenge for the women in the group. Give us your thoughts by pointing out things that you believe would help us present ourselves better, as a whole and as separate individuals. I for one would like to hear your ideas, and I'm sure the others would also. I've been told I can use a lot of help -- so give me help. Take care, Respectfully Submitted, Gloria Sue Fenton
By Cheryl Sometimes
there are months where so much happens one has no idea where to begin.
July was one of those months for me.
Matt (Lisa) and I attended SPICE which started off like the Titanic maiden voyage. One of us managed to tip over the canoe the very first night. There can be a lot of humor found in watching Matt jaunt through a fancy hotel in his stocking feet for two days. Amazing how long it takes wet tennis shoes to dry. SPICE was really a mixed group this year. We had couples, wives only, husbands only, one unattached male (who wanted to be sure his next relationship didn’t fail), and the one and only Prince Charles (Virginia herself). We even had two husbands who tricked their wives into coming. I was really impressed by this. We were told that every SPICE so far has managed to bring about the reconciliation of at least one fractured marriage. This year proved to be no different. By the end of the convention, one wife who had been ready to seek divorce had indicated that she was willing to wait for a while and see what changes would come about as a result of SPICE. Over the next few months, I’ll try to share with you some of the information we gathered from SPICE. It was an incredible experience. For those who read Gloria’s announcement, yes we finally did it! July 11th, Matt and I officially announced our engagement. This week we will meet with Rev. Nicole Kirk. When I talked with her on the phone she seemed more than willing to perform both ceremonies. So we should have a busy year coming up trying to plan the weddings. I’m sure Lisa would appreciate any help planning hers. I know I’m depending heavily on Kathleen to help with mine. We are planning for both to be traditional even though one will be a bit unusual. For further information as the time passes keep an eye on the bridal webpages that Lisa HAS PROMISED to publish. Hopefully they will happen before the weddings. She is such a procrastinator but I do love her. The Rainbow Trail now has 1199
hits! That must mean that we
are reaching out and touching others. I
was promised more information to add to it.
I’m still waiting!!!!!!!! I’m
sure web surfers would like to hear more about other SO’s than just me.
How about it, girls??????? By
the way, this month instead of just one article I published two.
Actually I took one long article and divided it over two months –
August and September. So read
about telling your children and provide some feedback.
Should they be told? When? If they shouldn’t, how do you keep it from them?
And……what if they accidently find out? The following is the article which I wrote and will be printed in the next Sweetheart Connection: TIP-A-CANOE AND CHERYL TOO It was a hot, humid day in the middle of July. In spite of the heat, Matt and I valiantly set forth to traverse the uncharted waters of the lake in our canoe. One of us, experienced in the art of canoeing only singly, sat in the stern. The other, a newbie who shall remain nameless, sat in the bow. Challenged by our fearless leader to practice the “J” stroke, we felt confident enough in our skills to cast off fully clothed, life jackets within reach. Off we went. Paddling with our usual aplomb, we soon found ourselves traveling the breadth and width of this tiny lake. Encountering huge masses of seaweed and other delicacies, we quickly turned into what became the first of many uncoordinated circles. Back-paddling furiously we managed to break from the green seagarden and again went on our merry way. Alas to our everlasting humiliation, one of us zigged when the other zagged. The brave canoe struggled valiantly before setting us free – in the lake. As the two of us tread the chilly blue water, those on shore laughed with glee at the first and only casualties of SPICE VII. As our rescuers approached, we rescued the floating lifejackets and threw them into the traitorous canoe. With little dignity and a lot of water, we trudged ashore to face the music. The laughter pealed from all as they espied our wet, bedraggled attire. While they laughed, we looked at each other and realized that at least we were cool and they weren’t. (GRIN) It is all too true. Matt and I did manage to tip over the canoe and take a dip into the lake fully clothed. It presented all of us at SPICE many opportunities to laugh and joke about it. At the same time there is at least one lesson to be learned. I’ve canoed alone many times – never with a partner. This time was different. He and I had to coordinate not only our strokes but also which side of the canoe we were paddling from. This involved communication. Although we talked a lot, obviously we weren’t saying the right things or we wouldn’t have landed in the drink. We got our signals mixed and paid the price – wet shoes for two days. There is a time to be independent and a time to depend on others especially your partner, a time to work alone and a time for two to work as one, a time to say “I’m sorry” and a time to say “I forgive”. (Honey, I’m sorry about those soggy cigarettes.) Now if we can just take the “J” stroke lessons into our marriage….hmmmmmm. I’m sure Onnalee will refresh our memories at every opportunity. In the meantime, I’m already looking forward to SPICE VIII. Hopefully there are no canoes in Houston especially since the theme is “2000: A SPICE Odyssey.” (Honey, have you ever been in a space ship?) See you all at the picnic! Love, Cheryl
Driven
to Distraction Some people stress out in traffic jams; some get busy. . . 45.7% Percentage of females who’ve applied makeup while stopped in traffic. 3.8% Percentage of males who have done so. Reprinted from Family Circle 4/1/99 RESTROOM
NOTICE It
would be greatly appreciated if, from now on, the main "Ladies"
restroom located by the kitchen is designated for the women - only as it is
not a single occupancy facility that can be locked for privacy. Also,
as we do provide a changing area, it would be appreciated if those CD's
needing to change clothes would utilize this facility instead of using a
restroom. There is a restroom in the Changing area, if needed, for
those seeking privacy. Also,
there is no longer a charge for using the changing room.
READING MATERIAL Susie has asked that we pass on this following information for those who may be interested: Dr. Sheila Kirk has released a new book on hormonal therapy entitled "Feminizing Hormonal Therapy". This is a new, updated, revised and expanded publication dealing with vital, current and insightful information on hormonal regimes. Also discussed are realistic expectations and possible complications of such therapy. This book is available through Together Lifeworks, P. O. Box 38114, Pittsburgh PA f15238. Send checks or money orders for $16.95 plus $2.00 for shipping and handling along with an address to ship the book to. Other books by Dr. Sheila Kirk available from Together Lifeworks include: "Physicians Guide to
Transgendered Medicine" "Medical, Legal, and
Workplace Issues for the Transsexual" "Masculinizing
Hormonal Therapy for the Transgendered" THE CLOTHES The clothes I wear do not make me "Gloria" any more than the clothes I wear make me "Martin". It is the words and actions that come from my heart, mind, and soul, that define the person I am. My heart, mind, and soul are guided by the emotions, knowledge, and beliefs that have become engrained in me through my own existence and co-existence with anyone and anything that has touched my entity.
It is very important to me that people know the person I am and use that as the basis of how they are going to judge me as a human being, rather than judge me by the clothes and things that are not important at all. "Gloria is "Gloria." "Martin" is "Martin". I do not try to "pass" because, to me anyway, it indicates I am trying to fool someone, or to hide something. It took me a lot of years to be able to find a spark of pride in being who I am as a human being, and I don't want to hide that from those I care about. Everyone in the world may not know all about Gloria, but they don't need to, any more than everybody in the world needs to know all about Martin. I will probably never know why Gloria exists, or why there is the intense need to express who I am, and be at peace with that, while needing those same things as Martin. I would never wish this duality on anyone because I know the dark side of fear and guilt that can be a part of it, and how it can tear your life and the life of those around you apart. When we are very young, there is this intense compulsion to wear the clothes. As we reach puberty, a sexual aspect becomes part of the process. Generally, all along there are the questions, and insecurities as to why we have this need, and this leads to fear, guilt, anger, frustration, and pain. Somehow we grapple to keep our lives and our sanity; and, hopefully, in time allow ourselves to accept what is, even if we don't know why. Some of us find individuals or groups that help us to explore this buried identity. As we explore and discover, we find a part of our being that we give the freedom to express. And the more we express this being, the less important that the clothes, make up, and other things are to being a crucial part of our identity'; and the human being we are finds its own reality. I realize that not everyone who meets or sees Gloria will or will ever be able to see beyond the clothes, or what they perceive. I try to give them understanding for that, because I was there myself for a long time. As we ask society for understanding and acceptance, we in turn have to give society the same. We also need to give that same understanding and acceptance to those who we claim to be a part of our community. We have to see beyond the labels we toss around at each other, and put aside the egos, the temperaments, and all those things that are not really important to the cause we claim to be striving for. If we can't see beyond our own differences and work as human beings towards a worthy goal, then how can we ever expect society to see beyond our differences from them, and treat us as human beings. We also have to accept and realize that not everyone of us is ready and/or willing to rush to the front lines to wage the battle for understanding and acceptance. We need to respect each other's rights before we make demands. As a community, we can unite. As a community, we can fight the good fight. But first we need to stop fighting each other, and as they say, "make a plan and work the plan". The clothes we wear do not make us the human beings we are. We need to look within our own hearts, minds, and souls as human beings to find ways to unite and then ask for understanding and acceptance from within our own community and then from society. If we can't work together and give ourselves our own "human" rights, then how can we ever expect "Society" to see beyond the clothes and make up. I get awful tired of hearing or reading how an individual puts down another individual or a group, or how a group puts down an individual or another group. It's plain, pure nonsense. We are different individuals and different groups; and we can have different needs as individuals, or we can have different areas we focus support in as groups. Why not? Isn't that an inherent right we claim as human beings? A while back I heard of an individual who was kicked out of a group because they supposedly were not progressing fast enough to suit some others in the group. This goes beyond nonsense, this is arrogant stupidity. And this is a sample of the ignorance that keeps "this community" from realizing that the diversity of ourselves as individuals and as groups, should be the core of the strength that unites us all. Like I said in the beginning of this article, wearing women's clothing doesn't make me Gloria, or the human being I am. And, likewise, just because another individual wears women's clothing, that doesn't make them think just like me or need the same support that I do. Maybe before we can get society to even listen to us, we need to remove our own blinders, and see beyond "the clothes" to the person inside and practice the understanding, acceptance, nurturing, and caring, that we preach about. That philosophy has to apply to different groups, wives, partners, family members, friends, and every one of us whose lives are affected by crossdressing and gender expression. If we can't do that for ourselves and all of us affected by crossdressing and gender expression, then we don't have any right to demand it from society, because we don't deserve it. I have a right to not be judged by "society", by the "community", or by you; and so does my group. And you have the right to not be judged as a human being by "society", the "community" or by me as well Clothes do not and never will unit us, but giving each other and each group respect and dignity can, if we let it.
Gloria
Sue Fenton Age:
40 something, in reality Height:
5' 5" Weight:
A little more than I'd like, at least at the moment.
I'm working on it. Hair
color:
Blonde - to the bone Eyes:
Green Married:
Most happily Children:
One son that I haven't seen in many years. A.O.
Member:
Almost 11 years TriEss
Member:
Almost 11 years Currently:
President of Alpha Omega Prev.
pos. held:
Chaired General Affairs Committee
Co-editor of newsletter for 4 years
Served on several committees President
of Alpha Omega, 5 previous times Accomplishments:
Have tried to be a good friend and leader for the group, Have been
honored to be "Lady of the Year" three times Goals:
To help Alpha Omega be there for others who need us. That is what
really matters. Other
interests:
Reading, shopping, writing, crafts.
How I hope others see me: As
a friend who cares about
them and the group very passionately
(RAIN OR SHINE) I thought I'd give you a little idea of just what the menu will be for this year's cookout: Main dishes: Italian sausage with peppers and onions/rolls, B-B-Q beef/rolls Salads: Spinach salad Pasta salad Potato salad Snacks: Veggies, chips, dips, etc. Dessert: Ice cream/sherbet Fruit Upside down cake Beverages: Punch, coffee, tea There will be vegetarian and egg-less choices, too! Other than bringing your sweet, wonderful, charming selves to our home, the ONLY item you might want to bring would be if you have a particular favorite beverage. Weather permitting, there will be volleyball or badminton, and horseshoes available to play. Kathy and I look forward to having you share the hospitality of our home, and having a great time. You can show up any time form about 1:00 p.m. on, on Saturday, August 14th. There will be a brief group committee session about 2:00 p.m. so we can follow up on committee and project progress for this year. Continuous snacking, but main course around 4:00 p.m. Please keep in mind this is a "non-dressed up" event that Kathy and I do for our friends. There is NO MEETING FEE, so join us and have some fun. If you need directions contact me or the group message center so we can get them to you.
AN ANNOUNCEMENT It
is with great pleasure that I take a moment to officially announce the
engagement of Matt (Lisa) and Cheryl. At present plans are for the weddings
to take place next year. Matt and
Cheryl's wedding is planned for late August 2000; and the wedding of Cheryl
and Lisa for the Alpha Omega meeting night in September so we all may share in
the excitement. We will keep you
informed of details of events as the weddings approach. Congratulations,
Matt and Cheryl! Love Always, Gloria
Olena-Maria is
putting together a book of Cders real life experiences.
The first part will be on first time em femme and what happened, good
or bad, inspirational or embarrassing. I
need to get mine into her yet too, so let’s all get busy and give her the
story on what your first time was like. Email her at: olenatris@aol.com Sherry is
working on the Alpha Omega Cookbook. Please send her a recipe or two, we will all enjoy the fruit
of her laborers once the book is completed. Email her at: reed1959@aol.com
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DRESS CODE --
ALONG
THE RAINBOW TRAIL
The
physical, mental, and spiritual presence that
