President Gloria called the meeting to order. Lori introduced our guests. Denise, this is her first meeting. Sherry, her third meeting and Jo Ann who became an associate member. The Be All is going on now. Susie is there. She will write an article for the newsletter. Paradise in the Pocanos is November 5 through November 8. The Riverside Gala is November 20, 21, and 22. We have registration forms.

TREASURER'S REPORT: In the checking $3061.29. Charity and library fund $377.00. Petty cash $50.00.

Gloria talked to Jane Ellen. She is impressed with our Web Page.

At the picnic in August we will have a group committee meeting at 2:00 p.m. The last Sunday of this month we will have a constitution meeting at Peggy's. Gloria will draft a letter to the church stating that we would like to move with them to the new church.

For the meal for the July meeting it was suggested we have a cold cut tray. Olena volunteered to get the cold cut tray. Marla will bring a relish tray, Kathy snacks, Diane dessert, JoAnn condiments and buns.

Lisa told us we could get a domain. Diane Vernon made the motion we get the domain, Cheryl seconded the motion passed.

Marla stated that if anyone wants to get on the E-mail list, let her know or Lisa know if you want to be added.

Our speaker for the evening is Roz from Merle Norman.

With no further business, Kathy moved we adjourn, Cheryl seconded.

Respectfully submitted,
Elaine Benton
Secretary/Treasurer

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THE WIND BENEATH MY WINGS

By Gloria Sue Fenton

There probably isn't anyone who knows the depth of my commitment to Alpha Omega any more than Kathy. She knows all about the hours I've spent writing articles and hoping they just might mean something to somebody -- at least once in awhile.

She knows that from the early morning hours until after we get home on a meeting day, that my heart, mind, and soul are so concentrated on doing everything I can to make that particular meeting special for everybody -- even when I haven't been an officer.

She knows that I try to always speak to everybody at a meeting to let them know how glad I am that they are there, because I do care that they took the time to be a part of my life for that moment.

She knows that I try to make myself available to anyone who wants or needs to talk, at any time - because I know what it is to not have somebody to listen.

She knows that I like to have fun and make people smile, because I like to share happiness - there's been far too many sad times in my life.

She knows that I have tried to have others get to know Martin because for a majority of the time, it is he who the world sees. He is a part of my life as I am of his. I want others to know him as a person as they know me.

It took too many years to find pride in being Martin and Gloria -- I don't want to lose a moment of that good feeling.

She knows the times I have felt frustrated because I couldn't find words to put on paper, or I felt that somehow I had failed to help someone. I don't like feeling as though I have failed.

Kathy also knows that the things I do, or at least try to do, are not driven by personal ego. What really matters is that the spirit of friendship and understanding that is the "soul" of Alpha Omega remains fresh and alive for everyone who is a part of our group, and also for all those we have yet to meet.

Just as others make it possible for us to find Alpha Omega, and begin to discover our total being, it is our duty to keep that door open for another.

When I first met Kathy there was just something about her that I knew was special. I can't really describe it, other than to say it was like knowing that if you were a part of her life, that she cared about you. It is a spirit that I, as Gloria have tried to share with those in my life. Kathy is very much my hero. Without even saying a word, she can look at me and affirm that in spite of all my flaws, that she is proud of me as Martin and as Gloria.

As Alpha Omega was a part of my life when we met, she chose to let it be a part of hers as well, and has given her commitment for the good of others. For nine years now, Kathy has been a part of my growth as Gloria. She has been a foundation to build on, a rock to lean on, and a strength to depend on.

She is the wind beneath my wings so that my life has found meaning. She has been an inspiration for me as Gloria. And, hopefully, maybe there has been something I may have said or done at some time that may have helped another to lift their spirit, and find who they are. It is something that I must try to do, for as long as I can.

Do what you can to be the wind beneath the wings of another. It is worth the effort.

At least that's what I think. How about you?

Respectfully Submitted,
Gloria Sue Fenton

 I received a phone call from Roz last night. . .unexpectedly. . .

 Since she does not have a computer she asked me to convey her thanks to all the girls for such a wonderful experience. . .she was still glowing with excitement when she mentioned how much fun she had at the last meeting. She wanted to thank all the girls that participated and were good sports. She also wanted to thank Gloria for welcoming her so graciously, and of course, all the girls who hovered around her to make her feel comfortable. A special thanks also to Lori for escorting her to her car.

And, of course, she still had to mention that she hates me for my "legs".J (hey, you should have seen me when I was twenty) LOL.

Thanks, gals. . .I think we made a very favorable first and lasting impression on someone outside our group. I think we are great ambassadors to our cause when we leave someone with such a good impression and that impression educates and enlightens others. We generate another ripple in this world and when we change perceptions we are viewed most favorably in a positive and accepting light.

I am glad that I met Roz, not only because it is convenient to me as far as make up is concerned, but because she is so accepting and positive about my experience and accepts Olena without judgement or condemnation and that is comforting and means the world to me.

Love,
Olena Maria

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"When I'm not in my right mind, my left mind gets pretty crowded.

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RECOMMENDED READING

Many of us TV/TG types are in constant search of information for make-up techniques, style points and voice training. We may also be searching for a better understanding of what it is we do. . .and why. . .or perhaps we're in search of our spiritual selves within our duality. The following is a list of recommended reading which you may find of help:

Masculine to Feminine and All Points In-Between by Jennifer Anne Stevens. (Different Path Press, Cambridge, MA). Jennifer Anne identifies herself as a practicing "T" who lives as a man on the west coast and a female on the east coast. This book is a practical text book approach featuring how-to on subjects including voice and dress, complete with instructions, in a witty yet sensitive style. Available by mail from Lee's Mardi Gras Boutique.

Crossdressing With Dignity by Peggy Rudd, Ed.D. (PM Publishers, Kathy, Texas). Besides her academic credentials, Dr. Rudd is the wife of a crossdresser. This book does not pontificate, rather, it gives air to the voices and feelings of crossdressers and their struggles with issues of guilt, coming out to one's spouse and family, etc. Also worth checking out by Dr. Rudd. . .My Husband Wears My Clothes. Both are available by mail from Lee's Mardi Gras Boutique.

Vested Interest: Crossdressing and Cross-Cultural Anxiety by Marjorie Garber. (Routledge Press - hard cover - Harper Collins in paperback). Professor Garber traces crossdressing through history. She also discusses crossdressing's societal implications. Many photos included. Available through Lee's Mardi Gras Boutique and many bookstores.

Transformations, Crossdressers and the People Who Love Them by Mariette Pathy Allen. Ms. Pathy, a photographer, happened to book into a hotel that was hosting a crossdressing convention in 1978. She's been photographing the CD community ever since. This is a book of intimate and beautiful portraits with interviews from many viewpoints. Available through I.F.G.E.

Crossdressing, Sex and Gender by Drs. Vernon and Bonnie Bullough. (University of Pennsylvania Press, 1993). This book gives it all. . . the history of crossdressing from pioneers to today's contemporaries. . .all in an easy-to-read style. Available through I.F.G.E. or your local bookstore.

Freeing The Natural Voice by Kristin Linklater. (Drama Book Publishers). Available on the Internet through Barnes & Noble.com.

Designing Your Face by Way Bandy (Random House). This is the quintessential make-up bible. Bandy loads up on technique, and the obvious love of his work shows.

Boobs, Boys and High Heels, How to Get Dressed In Just Under Six Hours by Dianne Brill (E. P. Dutton). Miss Brill, the '80's queen of the night clubs teaches flirting fundamentals. Bookstores.

The Man in the Red Velvet Dress by J. J. Allen (Riverbend Books, 1996). Many TV/CD types swear by this book.

She: Understanding Feminine Psychology by Robert H. Johnson (Harper Perennial Press). This psychologist produced an arresting and perceptive exploration of what it means to become a woman from the mythological perspective of Amor and Psyche.

SOURCES:

or

Here's to better reading. . .and to becoming a better woman.

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QUESTION OF THE MONTH

DO YOU HAVE ANY SPECIFIC MAKE UP OR CLOTHING SUGGESTIONS FOR LOOKING "COOL" IN SULTRY SUMMER HEAT?

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Here is the next installment from Tanya:

by Bonnie August

1. Dress Thin in comfortable clothes. Discomfort produces heavy-looking movements.

2. Clothes that pull and show stress lines where you're heavy call attention to those problem areas. If a garment can't be altered to fit properly, out with it!

3. "A little looser is always better" -- designer Pauline Trigerfe. (She didn't mean baggy, though.)

4. Instead of a girdle, use my Dress Thin System and Style Guide to correct your proportions with clothes.

5. If anything you own has tight elastic that produces bulges, banish it. Panty line is a prime culprit. . .turn any panties that are too tight into dustclothes.

6. Slumping adds pounds! Practice CHIN IN, STOMACH IN to improve posture and look sleek.

7. Heels that are too high, over 2 1/2", are bad for posture. They force you to push your stomach out for balance. If you must wear them on some occasions, keep a standby pair of low heels handy and switch over whenever possible. {Not exactly true. See my "Legs" article}

8. Keep your problem areas covered, eg, if your thighs are heavy, don't wear short-shorts; if your derriere's generous, make sure your swimsuit covers cheeks adequately. (Get a new suit if necessary.)

9. Don’t wear a should-strap bag at a length that makes the bag bounce on any heavy area of your body (hips or rear, for instance).

10. Expose and emphasize figure assets---good legs with a short skirt, for example.

11. If you're heavy, wear good jewelry near your face (earrings, a pin high on the shoulder) to carry the eye upward. Don't just save these precious Dress Thin accessories for special occasions.

12. Tuck your blouses, shirts or tee shirts smoothly into your panties so they won't bunch up and pad your tummy. If pocket linings show through, have them removed and the packets sewn closed.

13. Breast-droop makes you look heavy. Put on a bra that lifts you and watch the pounds come off.

14. Wash your good bra soon after wearing to preserve support qualities.

15. No matter how small-breasted you are, wear a running or ports bra for active sports. Otherwise, breast-droop will result, and soon! (No worry here! T.)

16. NEVER get dressed without consulting a full-length mirror. (If you don't already own one, buy one today) Use a hand mirror to check profile and rear view.

17. Wherever you're heavy, camouflage with dark or cool colors. Stick with very small patterns. (Cool colors: blue, green, blue-green, blue violet, bluish-brown, greenish brown, bluish or greenish beige and gray.)

18. Wear shoes, hosiery, and skirt all in the same, color: subtract ten pounds below the waist.

19. Wherever you're thin, spotlight with light, bright or warm colors, something that glitters, or big pattern element. (Warm colors: red, orange, yellow, reddish-purple, red-brown, yellow-brown, reddish or yellowish beige and gray.)

20. Don't wear heavy fabrics that "stand up by themselves" or bulky knits. Dress Thin in supple, thin fabrics, flat knits, and the flatter furs, such as Alaska seal.

21. Cultivate the vertical: sell your horizontally worked fur (or quilted) coat. A vertically worked style will make you look twice as thin. Wear long scarves, vertically striped clothes, dresses that button from hem to neckline (leave top and bottom buttons unbuttoned). And turn up your collar -- especially if you're heavy below the waist.

22. Wear V-necklines. Never button anything all the way up. A glimpse of skin carries the eye up and down.

23. When you wear boots, be sure your skirt covers your boot top. A gap between boot and hem is fattening because if interrupts the long body line.

24. Suppress the horizontal: not just stripes, also flounces, borders, boat necklines, even ankle-strap shoes and ankle bracelets.

25. Don’t wear ruffles anywhere when you're heavy.

26. Skirts and pants that cling reveal too-curvy curves and bulges. An ounce of prevention is worth a lot of pounds, so wear a non-cling slip under skirts, and panty hose marked "ultra sheer" under pants. Also keep a can of antistatic spray hand for emergencies.

27. If you're a jogger, choose running clothes in synthetic fabrics that allow sweat to evaporate so your shorts and tee shirt won't cling to your curves revealingly.

28. Whatever proportion problem concerns you, you can minimize it, camouflage it or balance it with a well-chosen suit jacket.

29. If you're not sure whether pants are flattering, don't wear them.

30. If you're heavy below the waist, and you own a cape---it's great camouflage---Dress Thin in it.

31. If you're heavy below the waist, wear should pads for balanced proportions.

32. A wrap skirt is great camouflage for tummy, hips and derriere; a wrap dress reduce full bust and waist, ditto for a wrap coat. Subtract five to ten pounds with any of the above.

33. Tummy bulge? Put on a sweater set and watch it disappear.

34. Never wear a belt so tight it makes you bulge above or below it; the best belt is a contour style. Disown anything with a tight elastic waistband. Don't wear a felt on a fur coat.

35. If you're short-legged, you can easily look heavier than you are. Don't wear contrast-color belts, or knee socks; have cuffs removed from pants. Wear high heels and pants. Wear dresses and skirts no longer than just below the knee.

36. Everyone's legs look longer and thinner in slingback and backless mule shoe styles.

37. Five pounds off in twenty seconds? Control top pantyhose will do it!

These hints are from Bonnie August's book. By now, I doubt if I need to repeat the title.  Even though they cover some situations that usually don't involve problems we have, I thought it would be educational to print all 37. Read them twice (or more). I  think you'll find some real "gems" of fashion  wisdom to help you look your best.

Next month: "57 Shop Thin Time and

Money Savers." You'll love them!

 

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By Olena Maria

Based on the last several Alpha Omega Meetings I came to one earth-shattering conclusion. Femininity is a very complicated, difficult, unnatural, frustrating and complex state to master, especially for a feminine challenged crossdresser.

How difficult could this be?. . .My original plan, as I started to dissect and analyze my method to adequately transform this male physical structure into what I fantasized as the final product, a vision of a gorgeous femininity, would be to apply the same principals I applied to all my projects at home as well as at work. After all didn't I restore those old kitchen cabinets? Was I not successful in remodeling my office? Well, I thought, for a guy who is fairly intelligent and successful at my profession and fairly skilled in the arts of carpentry, electrical and plumbing, this should be a piece of cake. Careful analysis and planning, I thought, would highly reward me with a final product that was visually appealing and not to mention sensuous.  I was never so wrong in my life. . .The complexity of the feminine state not only overwhelmed me but reduced me to a broken mass of a crumpled heap in a cloud of make up dust

MAKEUP

My first attempt at makeup was to say the least disastrous. Envisioning my final product as an Ann Margaret, Sophia Loren, or even Katherine Denieuve, I anxiously stationed myself in front of my motel mirror, sighed a deep sigh and looked down at the row after row of makeup paraphernalia stretched out in neat rows in front of me which I had recently purchased. Taped on the mirror was my worksheet list which Roz, my first makeup consultant wrote down for me meticulously in the order that would practically guarantee that I would not screw up the makeup application. It was practically idiot proof plan. Practically. Step one, as I carefully read from my list: apply this then that etc. . .finally when I got to the end including eye makeup and lipstick I realized I had one compact case left which I had not used. To my utter dismay, it turned out to be the foundation. I had skipped step three and applied the powder and forgot the foundation! Skip turn and return to start. . .My second try was much more successful but I only managed to turn out looking like Bette Davis in her role in "hush hush little Charlotte". I had Bette Davis eyes, but unfortunately when Bette was around 70 years old!!!. . .Skip turn and return to start. . .My third attempt, well, to be kind, lets just call her a fat plump woman of the streets. . .my fourth and final attempt, and believe my I only stopped because I had no more time left, was a complete duplication of my sister, who I hate by the way.

CLOTHES

Is there some magic gene that women are born with that allows them to naturally know the right type of outfits and colors to choose? If there is, where can I get me some? Being feminine challenged, I envy the women that can fathom all the idiosyncrasies that go along with acquiring and maintaining the proper wardrobe that accentuates and compliments the body. Recently, I read an article by Tanya regarding the choice of wardrobe, the effects of cut, fabric and lines that improve the overall look and accent the positive elements of ones natural build while de-emphasizing the negative elements. Upon first glance this sounds simple enough, but by the time I got around to the middle of the article I was left reeling from ignorance (and I passed engineering physics with flying colors). And speaking of colors, warm versus cold, summer vs. winter. "Is there no end to this?" I cried helplessly. "I just don't get it". . .sound of head bobbing from should to shoulder.

My first attempt at buying women's clothes was hopeless. Still fearing discovery, I set out to purchase ladies undergarments for the first time. What better place to buy them than "Ambiance", the store for lovers. Many men shop at these stores, I thought to myself. There would surely be no suspicion regarding my real intentions. So I devised a clever scheme. I quickly searched through all my picture albums, looking for a woman that would somewhat match my size. I found a picture of myself dancing with a friend who seemed adequate. I took this picture with me to the store and produced this to the saleslady mentioning that I wanted to buy this for my wife and I was not sure of her size but could she estimate what I needed based on the picture. "I do believe she is about a size 10" she said, and I nodded in approval. . .what did I know. Then she produced a teddy, garter belt, matching stockings, push-up bra and a lacey camisole. "Uh, ok, I guess so" I said "Wrap it up". Arriving home, I quickly tried on the new garments, and of course, you guessed it. . .I could only pull up most of the outfit to my bellybutton and the stockings to my kneecap. Looking into the mirror, I got the ultimate 100-dollar laugh. At least I was smart enough to pass on the crotchless panties. That would have been a dangerously dangling experience.

CONCLUSION

I am soon approaching my second year of Alpha Omega. And, as you well know, since you see me at least once a month, I am still confused and challenged by the feminine experience. But with the help of my friends at Alpha Omega, I am slowly, and I emphasize slowly, learning better techniques in wardrobe, makeup and all the other complicated matters of femininity. And that, I believe, is the key to how this process works for women as well as us feminine challenged crossdressers. Mother may have never told me know to go about it, and of course, never my genetic sisters. But, having Alpha Omega "sisters" is the key. Every time I come to a meeting, I learn something new and useful. My sisters guide me when I am lost, steer me when I take the wrong turns, and they do it in a gentle positive way. And although I am feminine challenged, I feel eternally grateful for my new friends and sisters.

Love,

Olena Maria

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For our July meeting, we will have a guest speaker, Bonnie. Her program will be exploring the spiritual aspects of our feminine selves. This should be an interesting and thought-provoking meeting.

Also, at our July meeting, Lisa, Diane Brennen, and Marla will be giving us a peek at our web page.

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AUGUST: Get together at Kathy and Martin's home. Any time after 1:00 p.m.

Non-dressed event. (Martin promises not to play volleyball this year. Ed Elf)

SEPTEMBER: Open. We will be contacting Janet and Charlotte in the hopes they will be able to do a presentation for us. Some of you ladies have asked for help in choosing the appropriate colors and styles for yourselves. Maybe we can get some answers from our very much missed friends.

OCTOBER: National Speaker's Month.

Naomi Owen of Chi Chapter has agreed to be our speaker this year.

NOVEMBER: Open. Possibly a speaker on wigs and wig care.

DECEMBER: Christmas Party and Awards Ceremony. First Saturday of December.

JANUARY: Open.

FEBRUARY: Open. Nominations for officers for the coming year.

MARCH: Open. Final nominations and election of officers.

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 For the S.P.I.C.E. convention, there has been a change of address for registration:

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