List of Officers:
President: Gloria Fenton
Vice President: Michelle Stuart
Sec/Treasurer: Deborah Lynnette Lee
Newsletter Staff:
Editor: Tanya
Associate Editor: Debbie
Associate Editor: Sheryl
Graphics Editor: Deborah
PRESIDENTS'S VIEW By Gloria
MICHELLE'S MUSINGS By Michelle Stuart
1991 ALPHA OMEGA AWARDS
NOTES OF INTEREST
EDITORIAL
QUESTION OF THE MONTH
A LETTER FROM GLORIA By Gloria Fenton
JENNIFER'S JOURNEYS By Jennifer
GIRL OF THE MONTH
SOMTIMES By Rhonda Marie L
DSM & Transvestism, Yes or No?
DIGNITY CRUISE II
Well, 1991 is history. I believe it was a good year for Alpha Omega and I'm looking forward to 1992 with great enthusiasm.
I think it would be safe to say our Christmas party was a wonderful event! My highest praise goes to those who helped to make the party possible and to our award winners.
I have been blessed with fellow officers and members who have all worked hard, warming my heart with their support and concern. If I have had any success as a leader, it is because of these dear friends.
I would like to take a moment to give special recognition to our "Lady of the Year", Jennifer. She is a very dear lady who is a friend and truly was a sister when I needed encouragement and support. Congratulations Jenny!
The January meeting will be a discussion on our recent survey. It will serve as a springboard from which your thoughts as expressed in the survey can be transformed into active programs for the benefit of the membership. Be ready, as "Old Blondie" here has some ideas to challenge you with.
I will always be searching for new ideas and ways for our chapter to expand while still concentrating on meeting the needs of the individual members, be they crossdressers or wives and partners. Be forewarned, we will be "Looking For A Few Good Girls" in times ahead who can and will become involved.
In closing, let me again encourage everyone to submit articles for our newsletter or to the FEMME MIRROR. See you in January to start the new year.
Sincerely, Gloria
Hi Girls!
The Tri Ess convention turned out well, with around 200 in attendance. Chicago has always been a great town for this grand event. I consider Chicago to be the crossdressing capital of the country as the Windy City is the place to be!
Among the Alpha Omega members who attended were Jennifer, Tanya, Deborah Lee & Elaine, Megan and myself. Did I forget anyone? If so, please forgive me. [You didn't. ed.]
Due to work, I came a day late on Thursday. That was no problem as my roommate, Donna Mobley from Texas, couldn't make it any sooner, either.
Driving to Chicago was great on the turnpikes but I became snarled in construction on I94-80 in the south suburbs. Consequently, I arrived at the hotel too late to transform into Michelle for our trip to the dinner theater to see the play "Evita". I had to go "butch" - what a bummer! I felt out of place as the only guy on the bus with all those women around. (Even the bus driver was a lady!) I told Tanya, who sat with me, of how I kept looking for my purse instead of reaching for my wallet! Anyhow, the dinner was great and we enjoyed the play. The actors and actresses did a fine job.
Later, back at the hotel, a few of us had a couple nightcaps in the lounge along with happy chit chat. Perhaps I shouldn't say I just had "a couple nightcaps" as I woke up the next morning with a headache. Gee whiz! [See what happens when you're dressed like a guy! ed.]
Friday morning, after I got "into uniform", Elaine came to my rescue with some aspirin. Thanks a lot, Elaine! I had lunch with Donna, Jenny and Tanya down in the ballroom. Virginia Prince was the luncheon speaker and she discussed general topics regarding our community. The most important topic she spoke of was for our organization to introduce to our paraculture a new term to define the heterosexual crossdresser who lives normally as a man. That new term was "Bi-Gendered", or "BG". Virginia felt the word "transvestite" had been given too much association with articles found in many adult magazines. The general public, she feels, tends to think "transvestites" are "drag queens" or male prostitutes in female attire. The new term wouldn't be tainted and would be a more accurate definition for most of us in the paraculture. I second the motion.
That evening after dinner, we all boarded busses and headed downtown to the Baton Lounge for one of the finest, if not the finest, female impersonator shows. Those girls did a great job of entertainment and we all enjoyed the show. Maya Douglas was as beautiful as ever and Ginger Grant gave us her brand of humor. Of course, not to forget Chili Pepper, the long-time veteran of the Baton, who was great as ever. I forget the names of the other lovely ladies who had lend their talent to the show. I hope they will forgive me.
Saturday morning I awoke early (without a headache) and joined the other "earlybirds" for breakfast. Afterwards, I socialized with the girls for a while. Later, I decided to check out the vendors and let myself be tempted by all the "BG goodies" for sale. There was jewelry, dresses, manicures, photography, books, wigs and hairstyling by Rachel. By the way, Rachel's mother and sister helped with manicures. How nice of them to lend a helping hand!
I wound up buying a couple "Hipslips" from Geiger, which really worked in giving a more feminine shape around the hips. [These are not the Spandex "Hipslips" mentioned in many women's magazines but a special product for BG's to create proper hip contours. ed.] I got a bit "crazy" and also bought a lovely black satin French maid's outfit, complete with accessories. It was made by Laura Walton and is really cute.
Tanya and Jenny are always teasing me about the long skirts I wear and challenging me to try something mini and show more leg. I decided to give them a treat. Back in my room, I put on the maid's outfit, including fishnet hose. The nice way my legs looked suprised me!
I headed over to Jenny's and Tanya's room, knocked on the door and called out "Maid Service!" Boy, was Tanya shocked at the vision of the new Michelle! As Jennifer was still at the Board of Directors meeting, Tanya took a couple snapshots for posterity. I then paid a service call to Deb and Elaine's room. They also went into speechless stupor!
That evening, I slipped into a lovely cocktail dress of red taffeta accented with a black velvet bodice and low back. I kept the fishnet stockings on and slipped into my black anklestrap pumps. All set, I joined the others in the lounge for cocktails before the banquet. I found Debbie & Elaine and Tanya soon joined us. Jennifer and Donna arrived soon afterwards. Donna was a knockout in her tuxedo-style dress and her black hair. (She's normally a blonde.) She was "dressed to kill"! Tanya thought I was crazy with my maid's outfit till she laid her eyes on Donna!
We soon all gathered in the ballroom for the panoramic group photo. As there were so many of us, we had to squeeze together to all fit in the picture. With that business done, we all sat down at our tables for a dinner of prime rib. I sat with Elaine & Deb in the non-smoking section so we could breath a little easier.
After dinner, awards were given out to the Tri Ess sisters who had made large contributions to the organization. Naomi emceed the ceremony and all went well. Naomi also received an award for her selfless devotion to the paraculture. Congrats to all the awards recipients!
After the awards ceremony, there was music and dancing to the tunes of Da'nell Martin's "Mister Sister and the Gender Benders". Those who didn't dance enjoyed socializing with other sisters in the ballroom.
When the banquet wound down, several of us went back to the lounge for nightcaps till closing time. I sat with Donna, Tanya, Jenny and several others for more chit chat. We all had a great time. Later, back in our room, Donna and I made a few "crank calls" to friends in other rooms as we didn't want it all to end.
Sunday morning we all got up early for the farewell brunch. I always like the brunch as it is served buffet style. You can have all the bacon and eggs you want, along with toast, hash browns and other goodies to soothe your appetite.
After bidding farewells to several sisters, I headed back toward Cleveland on the turnpikes - with warm memories of the 1991 Holiday En Femme.
Next year, the Holiday will be in Atlanta. If all goes well, I will be going there for more fun times. If any of you girls can make it, I suggest you go.
Bye for now, Michelle
[At our December 7th Christmas party, chapter members who had distinguished themselves in service to and for Alpha Omega were recognized for their accomplishments. Below are presented the comments given to those in attendance concerning the awards and those who received them. They speak for themselves. ed.]
CHALLENGER
What is a Challenger? She is one who accepts tasks without question. She constantly searches for a better way to do something. She's not afraid to confront major problems. She always maintains the view, "If you're not moving forward, you're falling behind." She's never satisfied with "good enough". Several people in Alpha Omega could fit that
description but one exemplifies the word "Challenger" to the highest degree! Please join me in congratulating this years Challenger Award recipient, GLORIA SUE FENTON!
HELPING HAND
Remember when we were young? Boys hair was hair - Girls hair was beautiful. Dad was making sure we got to the barbershop every other week for a "burr cut" -
Mom was
showing Sis how to curl it, style it and place bows in
it. We were stuck with those thin lips, plain eyes,
pale skin and bushy eyebrows When Sis got old
enough for makeup, she and her friends learned how
to make thin lips look thicker, blue eyes more
radiant, winter white cheeks rosier and bushy
eyebrows were shaped to a pleasant arch.
For most boys, that situation was OK but, for a small percentage, things were quite different. We couldn't join in and learn all those wonderful things. We had to pretend we weren't interested.
Now, here we are, attempting to catch up on feminine talents and techniques Sis learned when she was 12 while, today, we are 30, 40, 50 or 60! Obviously, we couldn't appreciate anyone more than we appreciate those who give of their time and talent to assist us in our outward expression of our femininity.
Please join me in presenting our 1991 Helping Hand Award to our new and dear friend, JANET JACKSON!
SPECIAL PARTNER
Loving.
Caring.
Unselfish.
Understanding
. Supportive.
These are just
a few of the
many qualities
we all find
special in a
wife or partner
we share our
life with.
Some of the people in Alpha Omega are fortunate to
have such a person. Others hope to someday. This
chapter is blessed with many wives who not only fit
those descriptive words but who also join in our
activities either as a participant or as a worker,
helping to keep Alpha Omega in existence.
One lady has stepped to the forefront and is
making a major effort to help other wives understand
and reach a greater level of comfort with a husband
who crossdresses. This lady untiringly gives of
herself, not only to her husband, but to anyone in our
club who needs an ear or even a shoulder to cry on.
Please join me in congratulating our 1991 Special
Partner, KATHLEEN FENTON!
OUTSTANDING COUPLE
The words "Outstanding Couple" have a very
special meaning in the crossdressing community.
Unfortunately, marriages have a bad habit of failing
when our "special side" finally comes out in the
open. It is refreshingly pleasant to see a couple who
have managed to address the issue, cope with it and
even integrate it into their lives.
When such a couple joins a group like ours, their happiness and love for each other can only brighten and enhance other lives. For the struggling couple, they show hope for the future.
In Alpha Omega, we now have several couples who not only attend meetings but show a desire to get involved in many ways in an almost "teamlike" manner. A very special couple who exemplify love, understanding and dedication to each other as well as our chapter have been chosen for the 1991 Outstanding Couple Award. Please join me in congratulating CHERYL AND SANDY C.!
MESSENGER
According to "Webster's Dictionary", a messenger
is one who carrys a message or announcement to
others. Nowhere is this more important than in
articles of love, information, instruction, help,
feelings and humor written in our newsletter. Alpha
Omega took a leadership role in newsletter quality
about three years ago due to not only a desire to be
the best but continuous exceptional articles expressing
feelings of the writers rather than the copied articles
many newsletters exhibit.
The newsletter is our club's voice. It tells everyone across the country who we are, how we feel, our needs, our hopes for the future and our goals. Oftentimes, the articles convey lightness and humor about the subject of crossdressing, rather than the sadness, rejection and loss of family which, all too often, occur.
Few writers have the special ability to convey the full range of views, feelings and wit quite as well as one of our members has demonstrated. We're blessed to have her in our fold. She was one of the three people who grabbed hold when this chapter was in danger of dying. With no experience in writing or putting together a newsletter, she forged ahead with a spirit of "I don't know how I'll do it but I'll figure it out one way or the other."
She surely did figure it out and, along the way, helped many people through her writings. Please join me in congratulating our 1991 Messenger Award recipient, TANYA BROWN.
OUTSTANDING SERVICE
What does "outstanding" mean? I think of terms like "Above", "Best", "Greater", "Stand-out" and "Exceptional".
What does "service" mean? "Helping", "Duty", "Aid" and "Assistance".
When you put those words together, you'll find they don't fit very many people but they fit one of our members. This lady has worked tirelessly at whatever she has done for our chapter. She never says "no" to a job and always completes it in an outstanding fashion. The phrases, "I can't do it." or "I'm too busy." are not part of her vocabulary.
A few years ago, Alpha Omega consisted of a handful of people sitting in someone's livingroom. Nowhere to go, nothing being done. Basically just sitting still with a definite possibility of dying. The chapter was in trouble.
The recipient of this award was one of the three members who said, "No way! That can't happen here. This is too important!" Since then, she has exemplified the phrase "Outstanding Service" in every way she could. She has never required any payment for her time but the smiles and friendship of her sisters. She gives and gives of herself in a way that most clubs like ours rarely see from an individual.
It is an honor and privilege to present the 1991 Outstanding Service Award to my dear friend, DEBORAH LEE!
LADY OF THE YEAR
In
September the
membership of
Alpha Omega
took a vote as
to which
member of our
chapter
deserved to
receive an
award as
"Lady of the
Year" for
1991. The concept of the award comes from the idea
that one girl will stand out in her commitment to the
chapter over the previous twelve months. This year's
version of the award, being the first, is a little
different, however. The lady we're honoring has not
just been outstanding for the past year but for more
than three years. If it were not for her determination
and drive, Alpha Omega would not be here at all.
Jennifer Higgins joined Alpha Omega in early 1987. In mid-1988, she was elected President of the chapter, continuing to serve in that position until stepping down this past April.
In early 1989, a crisis arose within Alpha Omega which could have caused it to cease to exist. Jennifer, with the help of two sisters, refused to accept that eventuality. Literally collecting the records of the chapter (including the confidential information giving members' real names and addresses) FROM THE FRONT YARD of their previous caretaker, she set about to build a new Alpha Omega. What you see here this evening is the fruit of those labors. In 1988 there were three people at our Christmas party. Tonight we have ten times that number. In early 1989, Alpha Omega was little more than a pile of ashes. Today, like the mythical Phoenix, Alpha Omega has arisen from those ashes.
What Jennifer had done for Alpha Omega did not go unnoticed on a national level. In November, 1989, she was appointed to the Tri Ess Board of Directors and as Mid Atlantic/Ohio Valley Regional Coordinator of Chapter Development. Since then, she has given her all to improve our national organization. And, in doing so, brought our chapter to the attention of others nationwide.
Over the past three-plus years, I have spent untold hours on the phone listening to Jennifer bitch, "brainstorm", question, argue and, yes, cry. But never was the conversation on how she could improve her personal lot in life. "I" never entered the equation - it was "We". And the "We" involved either Alpha Omega or Tri Ess. Her dedication to our paraculture knows no bounds.
I present to you the 1991 Lady of the Year, JENNIFER HIGGINS!
[All awards presented by Jennifer except "Lady of the Year" which was presented by yours truly. ed.]
January Meeting
The January 11th meeting will be held at the
Manor. The evening will be spent covering the
results of the chapter questionnaire completed by the
membership last September. The results of the
"multiple choice" questions have already been
reviewed both at a meeting and in the newsletter.
However, there were a number of "essay" questions
which should provide most interesting topics for
discussion.
The Pushy Avon Lady
Some (most) of you may not realize it but our
own Elaine is a representative of Avon Cosmetics.
We kiddingly call her "The Pushy Avon Lady"
because she is the most "un-pushy" person you've
ever met! (Which is why you might not know she
works for Avon.) If you're interested in great
cosmetics and/or jewelry, DO see Elaine at a
meeting!
Great Ideas
Dee, a sister of mine from Indiana, passed on two
great hints recently. Dee is a pharmacist by trade.
Her first hint involves a product sold in medical
supply houses and some drugstores called "Stays
Put". Stays Put is a roll-on adhesive designed to hold
surgical hose up without needing a garterbelt. Dee
found it excellent for holding her prostheses in place
no matter how skimpy her bra. Stays Put will not
glue your prostheses to your chest - it's more of a
"stickum" than a glue - but it will totally stop
"migration" and, as it's designed to adhere cloth to
skin, it's totally harmless to both plus it washes out
easily.
Dee's second hint concerns the over-the-counter cortisone creams sold in drugstores. She has found it an excellent skin treatment after giving one's self a "supershave" prior to applying makeup. She said her irritation level dropped remarkably. I tried it this past weekend for the Paradise Club Xmas party and must state it was the first time I gave myself a "baby's butt special" and didn't suffer for days afterward! (BOY do I wish I'd had it at the Holiday En Femme last month!) Try cortisone cream. You'll be most happy with the results.
A personal note to G.F.: I've known of you for years and regret you cannot attend meetings. I have a few requests, however. #1. Don't go so long between letters to the chapter. You are a member and we'd love to hear from you! #2. We know you only by your male name. Do you have a femme name and, if so, what is it? Having to speak of you as "G.F." is too dammed impersonal! #3. A challenge: How about attending the 1992 Alpha Omega Christmas party? I'm giving you twelve months to prepare and work out the logistics. We'd love to see you, girl!!
The 1991 Holiday En Femme is now history and those of us who attended must face the horrible fact that it will be many months until the 1992 Holiday will be upon us.
The first day or so of the Chicago Holiday, I found myself suffering from a form of disappointment. Things just weren't like they were last year in Houston. Then I realized I was trying to compare my second convention with the first and nothing can ever compare to the "emotional high" you experience at your first convention.
That "high" was replaced and, by the end of the Chicago Holiday, perhaps eclipsed by another feeling, a sense of "family". When I walked into the registration room Wednesday afternoon, I was hugged to death by Amanda, the girl who went from never having dressed to "femme fatale" at the Houston Holiday - she had become a special sister to me. Moments later it was hugs and verbal abuse to/from my favorite short person and makeup artist extraordinaire, Jim Bridges. Wednesday evening there were Lynda and Marilyn Frank from NYC and the consummate "outreach experts", Michelle Lee from Washington State and Robin K. from Memphis. Thursday morning "Porthos" joined "Athos" and myself ("Artemis"). The "Three Musketeers" (Donna Mobley, Jennifer and I) were together again! Soon thereafter, "D'Artagnon" (our own Michelle Stuart) arrived. Later that night, Shirley Kay and Pat Kennedy from Colorado joined the fold. From that point on, none of us were very far apart.
Many of us have a favorite, far-away relative we only get to see occasionally. Coming together with them is always a special treat. In Chicago, I had a "family reunion" with NINE such favorite relatives! And, in each and every case, the twelve months since we'd seen each other last seemed to fade into insignificance.
One of the greatest joys I've found since I came out of the closet lies with the wonderful people I have met: The close sisters I have here in our chapter. The wonderful ladies I correspond with across our country. My three Tri Ess Little Sisters, one from the US and two from Canada. And, lastly, the sweet, sincere, dedicated (and slightly crazy) ladies from all over this land I have met - and come to love - at the Holiday En Femme. Today I have a family that is closer-knit and means more to me than many I am related to by blood.
If you have put off attending Alpha Omega meetings for whatever reason, reconsider. You cannot comprehend what you are missing in the way of friendships. If you have never considered corresponding with other Tri Ess sisters because writing is such a "pain", do so now. I cannot describe what it's like coming home after a completely rotten day at work to discover a letter from someone with whom you have total mutual understanding. If you like feeling "on top of the world", volunteer immediately for the Tri Ess Big Sister Program. To that which I said above about correspondence, add the incredible satisfaction of seeing a terrified, introverted and, sometimes, self- destructive new member open up and begin to feel good about herself with your assistance. What that does for the soul must be experienced to be appreciated!
Lastly, take all those excuses that have kept you from the Holiday En Femme and look at them with an analytical mind. "No time", "not enough money", "home situation", etc. Weigh them against concepts like "personal growth", "expanded horizons", "cultural awareness" and, yes, even "fun". But, more importantly, weigh them against the concept of "family". As you return from your first Holiday, or perhaps in the weeks after, the realization will strike that you have a whole new family - people you will give your all for and who will give their all for you. The miles that divide you mean nothing. A bonding much deeper than that which holds normal friendships together exists - created by life histories which are so similar even though they occurred at opposite sides of the country, or even the world. It is a bond that will last a lifetime.
Love, Tanya
P.S. I'd like to thank you all from the bottom of my heart for the beautiful certificate I received at the Xmas party. I received the award but the fact remains ALL OF YOU who contribute to the newsletter are the ones who give it life. Bravo ladies!!
The purpose of the "Question of the Month" is to address the needs expressed in our survey for discussions. While it is not possible to have discussion sessions every month, or address all the topics pointed out in the survey, I am hoping the "Question of the Month" may help spur talk during social time.
We will take just a few minutes before each business meeting to go around the room and get brief answers from everyone that would care to respond. As I say, this is not a time for discussion but a time to express viewpoints that can be discussed later. If a certain question really triggers our interest, we can use it as a basis for one of our discussion meetings later in the year.
After you read each month's question in the newsletter, think about it. Be ready at the meeting to give a very brief answer when asked for your viewpoint.
The question for January is:
Do you believe that, as a crossdresser, you have two separate distinct sides or personalities? Or, are you one individual?
Remember, keep your answer brief and use the responses you hear to feed conversation, inspire a newsletter article or be considered for a general discussion session.
Gloria
A couple months ago, Kathy and I were Xmas/window shopping. We really had a good time looking at the womens clothes that were flooding the stores. With Kathy laid off and no job in sight, Christmas (and especially "luxury") funds were, and are, at a minimum. But, at least, we could look and dream.
There are so many more stores catering to women than men plus their racks were loaded for Xmas shoppers. We must have browsed at least a dozen stores and really had a neat time looking at and talking about all the dresses, suits and colors that are in fashion now.
Kathy found a purple (her favorite color) sequined dress she would have purchased instantly under other circumstances. I know she would have looked great in it. My eyes, however, fell upon a beautiful royal blue dress I would have died for - even just to try it on. But let's just say I wasn't dressed properly for that situation. Besides, I'm not so brave as to have my maleself ask to try on a dress.
The dress was sleeveless but had large ruffles on the straps and neckline. The material was a soft, silky type that felt so good to the touch. I must confess, the hem would have come a few inches above the knee but, once in a while, a girl has to get a little wild and crazy. I even own a low-cut bra that would have worked perfectly with it. The real "killer", though, was the store carried it in my size!
It's not very often when shopping you find a dress you would love to own plus know it will fit. Usually you like the style but the color is all wrong and they never have it in your size anyhow. It was with a tear of remorse we both left those dresses hanging on the racks.
We saw several other nice outfits. We talked about them and how our tastes in styles do vary, at least a little bit. We both, though, still remember those two dresses most vividly. It's so nice to have someone I can talk to about clothes, jewelry or makeup and have them understand my thoughts and feelings.
Although most of my clothing is fairly conservative and not very flashy, I do enjoy a "wild" outfit once in a while. Even though I'm forty, it doesn't mean I want to look or act 40 all the time. I like to show a little thigh or wear something daring once in a while.
One evening at home a couple weeks after our shopping trip, I put on one of my older skirts - one my ex-wife had given me years ago. I asked Kathy what she thought about it. After her eyes returned to normal size and she could speak, she wondered if it might not be a little short for a girl my age! Well, I didn't agree.
Who knows. Maybe one of these meeting nights I'll feel wild and crazy and decide to see what you think about it. It's a beautiful skirt, one I used to wear a lot. That night I put it on and showed Kathy, however, was the first time I'd worn it in over five years. To me, it looked and fit just fine.
No matter what your style is, every once in a while a woman likes to do something different. I think we all are the same in that respect. As an example, I've even seen Jennifer in a skirt well below the knee - talk about daring!
I think the main point is we should be comfortable with what we wear and who we are. But sometimes we are willing to leave our normal "comfort zone" by dressing a little differently, a little wild. And I think every one of us deserves it.
Love Always, Gloria
Before I say anything else, I want to thank the chapter members for the great honor of being named "Lady of the Year". The plaque is beautiful and now resides on my living room wall as well as in my heart. It is a great feeling to see how far we've come over the last four years and I'm pleased to have been a part of it all.
The Holiday En Femme went well this year. There was a good crowd and everyone enjoyed themselves. It's always nice to see the gals from around the country that I only get to talk with on the phone or read their articles in newsletters during the year. I can't encourage you enough to make plans to attend this event each November. It really gives you a chance to talk with others about the things they are doing in their chapters and pick up some good ideas for our own. Many of us have pen-pals who they have never met face-to-face and the Holiday is an opportunity to do just that.
The Board of Directors meeting went very well and much was accomplished. A full report of what was discussed and voted on will be in the FEMME MIRROR. I can tell you the long-awaited DIRECTORY is almost finished and will be in your hands soon. Much of the business that takes place at a Board meeting is "nuts and bolts"-type and would not be of major interest to most members. However, it all needs to be done to keep the National organization functioning.
On the local level, for the coming year I will be trying to bring you some new and interesting speakers. One of our members has a few ideas for a discussion session, so we'll also look into that. Help from members is always appreciated.
On a related note, I want to inform you I will soon be contacting some major wholesalers of quality wigs and hairpieces with the plan of becoming a dealer. If all works out, you will be able to buy these items at great prices from someone who understands. It's a little easier than going into a wig shop and attempting to talk with someone you don't know. Some of the older members don't have a problem dealing with stores or people they don't know but it can be somewhat traumatic for new members just out of the closet. Hopefully, this will help.
I've also decided to start creating clip-on earrings that break away from the typical small "button-types" you normally see. They will be the long, dangly, beaded, feathered, sparkly shoulder-duster types you just cannot find as clip-ons. I've been doing this for myself for some time and thought you might enjoy owning some, too. Hey, if we're gonna do it, let's do it up right, huh?
I just received the newly-written "job description" for Regional Coordinators for Chapter Development. Looks like I may not be able to be quite as active on the local level with Alpha Omega as in the past. Matter of fact, what's being asked of us might require the average person to quit her job in order to have enough time!
I'd like to take this opportunity to wish you all a very Happy New Year and all the best you certainly deserve. See you at the January meeting!
Love, Jennifer
FEMME NAME: Megan Elizabeth Parsons
HOMETOWN: Willowick, OH
AGE: 43
MARITAL/CHILDREN: Married, 4 Children
OCCUPATION: Registered Nurse
HOBBIES: Astronomy, ancient music and piano.
MY FIRST EXPERIENCE AS A CROSSDRESSER WAS AT THE AGE OF: Eight
MY GOAL AS A CROSSDRESSER IS: At this point, I have been out of the closet only a year. To come up with a goal is difficult. The one goal I can think of is to be accepted in my female role. That is, to be able to dress male, female or androgynous as I please and be accepted in my community and with my family. More important, I would like to be able to help others like me in their early days just out of the closet. I would also like to help promote our acceptance in Society at large.
WHAT I LIKE BEST ABOUT BEING A CROSSDRESSER: The feeling I get when dressed. This feeling is one of being what and who I really am. It has always been missing when I am my maleself. Some would say these are erotic feelings. On the contrary, what I feel is an inner peace and comfort knowing and being who I really am.
WHAT I LIKE LEAST ABOUT BEING A CROSSDRESSER: The guilt and shame other people put upon us. I am still trying to feel comfortable with myself. I do not need to feel guilty for what I do or who I am yet I find myself very vulnerable to these feelings.
THE ONE WORD THAT DESCRIBES WHAT CROSSDRESSING MEANS TO ME: Loneliness.
IF I COULD CHANGE ONE THING IN THE WORLD, IT WOULD BE: Bigotry: The one glaring lesson I have learned is about bigotry. In our Western culture, we fear what we cannot understand. Instead of attempting to understand we suppress, ridicule, ostracize and generally make life miserable for those who are different. Those of us who are different can go a long way toward accepting others regardless of race, creed, color, lifestyle or mode of dress.
MY THOUGHTS ON BEING THE PERSON THAT I AM: I like the person I am. I like the feeling of being feminine. I like the role of a woman and all the things attendant to that role. I feel very comfortable dressing, acting and talking like a woman. In my everyday role, I prefer to be androgynous in my appearance. This is a compromise to my family and Society. My preference would be to dress and act more femininely in my everyday role. What I do not like is the loneliness and the constant feeling of not living up to someone else's standards. I often wonder how many other crossdressers feel the same way. Further, I wonder what their resolution to the problem is. I am a crossdresser and I will stay a crossdresser. All I ask from others is tolerance and understanding, yet that seems to be the most difficult request for others to act upon. Our society equates gender with genetic sex. For so many of us, gender has nothing to do with genetic sex. We are, therefore, outcasts of Society. I hope in my travels as a crossdresser I might be able, in some small way, to make a difference so that we might be accepted for who we really are.
Sometimes I feel special and clearly understand,
the softness of being a Woman and the firmness of being a Man.
To incorporate two people who go through life as one,
to share a body temple their sadness and their fun.
Sometimes I feel lucky; lucky that I can see,
a coin that has two sides and I can see them simultaneously.
Sometimes I feel gifted, a little different from the rest,
to judge a person on their merits and not the clothes upon their
chest.
But sometimes I feel doubtful and when day turns to night
I wonder, of the two of us, which is wrong and which is right.
Sometimes I feel all alone that the world wasn't built for me.
To try to explain the two of us is difficult, you see.
Some people try to understand and others never will.
It makes the battle that we face always one uphill.
Sometimes I want to give up and live my life a lie.
To say there isn't two of us but only I as I.
But then there is my soft side the feminine part of me.
The girl who lives inside my soul and is a part of me.
That's when she whispers softly, that I can't deny.
There really is the two of us not only I and I.
And did I ever stop to think, while making all this fuss,
that maybe what this world needs are more special people like us?
The following letter was written to Tere Fredrickson in response to an article in Gender Euphoria urging the removal of transvestism and transsexualism from the Diagnostic Statistical Manual used by psychiatrists and psychologists.
Dear Ms. Fredrickson:
I read of your recent project in Vol V, No.6 of Gender Euphoria and felt that I needed to write. At a recent IFGE Convention in Denver I had several opportunities to talk with Cynthia Howard of the Gender Alternative League about the same concerns you raise in your article. As I understand it, you both are working toward removing transgender behavior from DSM which you feel will improve society,s acceptance of transgender behaviors. I believe there is potential for doing harm to persons with such feelings if these categories are removed. Let me put some perspective on this statement. There are three problems facing the transgender community:
1. Most mental health professionals have had very little training in dealing with issues in human sexuality. Even fewer know how to intervene when transgendered situations create problems in a person's life.
2. Society is becoming more intolerant of all sexual behaviors and situations that do not conform to what is perceived "normal." Most people define "normal" terms of their own experiences. Anything else is a suitable candidate for banning.
3. Most people in the transgender community are not willing to make their behavior public. Crossdressers are afraid to lose their masculine status and the transsexuals just want to blend into society. This leaves only a minority who are willing to be visible to act as spokesperson.
Taking transgendered categories out of DSM will do little to solve the first two of the problems I stated above. This would leave the average clinician with no commonly found description of transgender behaviors. Without some definitions, the clinician may put the client in an even more negative category, e.g., schizophrenic or multiple personality disorder. Furthermore, most people know nothing of DSM, and so will be unaffected by removal of the categories. Yes, there was a public "splash" when homosexuality was removed from DSM. However, a major reason professionals were persuaded to remove the category of homosexuality was that many gays were willing to publicly state their personal situation. By so doing they demonstrated that they were real people and not"sick perverts." The risks here were enormous for those brave enough to take such a step. Removal of homosexual categories from DSM happened only after significant public awareness. Thus there was a large public movement long before the change in DSM, and that movement has continued to this day.
The study you are proposing to better define transgender behavior has the potential to be a significant contribution. However, the DSM categories have little if anything to do with theories. DSM is about definitions of "mental disorders." It lists symptoms to help the clinician in finding a clear diagnosis in such situations. Also, a description does not really help determine how a transgendered client should be supported. Only experience provides such guidance.
I am concerned that you believe that you can provide a definitive and absolute description of transgendered behaviors. There are three risks here:
1. Your work will be seen as self-serving because it originates within the community. You will need to link with objective professionals to assure this risk is minimized.
2. You will simply come up with new "labels." To have a set of descriptions that are definitive and comprehensive will result in something so complex as to be unworkable. In fact, were you to do this, you would have another form of the DSM categories.
3. You believe you have "the answer" to understanding and categorizing transgender behaviors. Many people have been studying and "explaining" it for many decades. None has described a verifiable etiology or acceptable terminology.
What I have written is intended to be both objective and helpful. You should know that I have been supportive of the transgender community for many years. As I told Cynthia Howard, " I am willing to work with you to change the public and professional attitude toward transgender behaviors. I believe the stigma of 'mental illness' and 'pervert' must be removed because that does not properly describe the vast majority of persons in the community."
To move forward requires education of both the professional community and the general public. The study you are proposing could be one step in educating the professionals. Much education is needed before any attempt can be made to change the DSM. Further before you push to change the DSM, you should determine what the alternative is to guiding clinicians who have transgendered clients. For example, the Harry Benjamin Standards of Care provide such guidance for clinicians who have transsexual clients. No such standards exist for intervention with crossdressing clients. In addition, it is important that transgendered persons support the education process by speaking to classes and at conventions.
Some persons in the community work to educate the public by appearing in the media. However some of people who are spokesperson often do more damage, and present unrealistic images of the community. If you are to make positive changes to society's perceptions, it is crucial to assess the impact of any public appearance before you agree to participate. It is key to decide what purpose is to be served by appearing. Ego has to be put aside, for even if it is a boost to say you appeared on such-and-such a talk show, if you damage the image of transgendered persons, you have set back the change in public perception. To minimize any negative impacts, I believe the needs to be some way of sensitizing the persons who are willing to appear in the media. This has to be done continuously, so that when an offer to appear is made, the person has the tools to decide whether to appear and what to say/do if they do appear. Some of this has been attempted on a local level. This work has been coordinated so that a consistent and positive image is presented. It is crucial to assure that you do not simply feed them the ratings of a program.
In sum, I believe it is a positive step for persons within the transgendered community to want to minimize the stigma associated with such behaviors and feelings. Using the gay community as a model, it is clear that political activism is one way to make changes. However, such an approach has risks, especially for those persons who choose to become publicly visible. It also has risks for the rest of the community, especially if the activists are not seen as truly representing the rest of the community.
As you see, I am Sending copies of this letter to Cynthia Howard and to Merissa Lynn. They (and you) have my permission to use this letter in its entirety to begin dialog on this crucial issue. In that way we can understand the community's desire and also get ideas on how to proceed.
Sincerely,
Roger Peo, Ph.D.,
Board of Certified Sexologist.
The previous article was reprinted from Tapestry Mailbag from The TV-TS Tapestry issue 59. [Our thanks go out to Dr. Peo for his continued support of our community. Deborah L. Lee]
On July 21, 1991, the passengers who were sailing with us on the Dignity Cruise arrived at the Miami Hyatt Regency for our pre-cruise meeting, dinner and party. There were 22 in our group including 4 wives and a girlfriend, my mother, father and step-son, and Jane and Mary's two children, Robert and David. The crossdressers who joined us included Cynthia, Jane, Jamie, Jheri and Melanie from Houston, Robin from Memphis, Virginia Prince, Gloria Jean from Florida, Karen from Riverside, Donna from San Jose, Janet from Albuquerque, Michelle from Seattle and Gloria Jean from Florida. We were joined at the hotel at our pre- cruise party by Nicki Bee, leader of Serenity, and two of her friends.
The Hyatt was notified in advance of our one night stay prior to the cruise and the staff was ready to roll out the red carpet for us. Several of our group had arrived the night before and had broken the ice for our group, especially in the bar and restaurant. There were a number of bar patrons that night who wanted to talk with members of our group. They had the expected questions: Why do you want to dress in women's clothes? Are you gay ? Do you want to become a woman? Are you married? Does your wife approve? etc. We were getting all pumped up for the cruise as we visited with representatives of the Royal Caribbean Cruise Line who were sent to our hotel to process our final paperwork.
We were delighted to have my parents and stepson with us. My parents have known about Melanie for over 15 years but had not seen Melanie in person. They have read Peggy's books and seen pictures and videos, but this was going to be the first time to meet Melanie in person. My stepson also had known about Melanie for 10 years, but had not seen me in person. Melanie did not appear until the first night on board. I was eager for that first meeting with my parents and stepson, but I was apprehensive.
At 1 PM the next day we boarded the Nordic Empress at the Miami Port. The ship looked larger and more beautiful than I ever expected. The Nordic Empress is a new ship with 10 decks and capacity for 1600 passengers and 700 crew. The middle of the ship is an atrium 8 stories tall with spiral staircases, cascading waterfalls and glass covered elevators. It seemed like we were sailing on a floating Hyatt Regency.
Unpacking our suitcases was no small task, since I brought over 20 possible combinations of outfits for Melanie. There was an assortment of shoes so large it resembled the full Cobbie Shoe Store. I had every kind of shoe including heels and flats. Finding a place for everything proved to be the greatest challenge of the day.
Later we went up to the top deck of the ship where a buffet was being served. We dined on hamburgers and hot dogs with all the trimmings. At 5 PM the ship began to move out of its berth toward the open water of the Atlantic. After a mandatory safety drill we returned to our room and began to dress for the Captain's welcoming party and our first formal dinner of the cruise. That first night I wore a long black dress with a multi-blue colored jacket, black hose and black patent heels. I spent over an hour on my makeup and Peggy helped me comb out my wig. I looked presentable at long last. As we entered the huge Las Vegas type showroom which was quickly filling with passengers, I expected all eyes to focus on Peggy and that "man in a dress" who was with her. People smiled and were friendly, but there were no significant reactions. If I was read the other passengers were at least being civil.
For months prior to the cruise, Peggy had an interaction with the crew of the ship, thus they were well prepared for our arrival. From the beginning of the cruise all staff and crew seemed to welcome us with open arms. Some of our other group came into the showroom and began to look for available tables. The girls looked ravishing. All of the wives and Joan, Jheri's girlfriend, were dressed to the hilt. Some of our group were at the first dinner seating. Since this included my parents they did not meet Melanie until the second night of the cruise.
After the welcome by the Captain and introduction of the ship's officers we were off to dinner in the spectacular two story dining room at the opposite end of the ship. On the first night our group was seated at three tables in the dining room which seats 850. Two of our group, Michelle and Robin, wanted to sit with other passengers away from our group, so they could "mix and mingle." They were seated at a table with 3 couples - more about that experience later. Peggy and I sat at a large table with 7 others from our group and one very handsome younger man, Joe, who asked to be placed at our table. This 30 year old man from Montana who travels so much he calls himself, "a professional cruise passenger." According to his story he travels on 6-10 cruises yearly.
Dinner on a cruise ship is the ultimate in luxury and gourmet food. We could order up to 8 courses with over 8 selections of entrees, great wine and sinful desserts. Our waiter attended to our every need and the headwaiter spent considerable time at our table. He was very interested in our group and later asked if he could have an order blank to order Peggy's books. The people at the tables around us were all eyes and ears as we all sat down, began to talk among ourselves and eat the many courses over the next two hours.
As is always the case when crossdressers are present, the cameras came out of purses and flashes were frequent. I noticed that people at adjoining tables were taking more pictures of us than of people at their own tables. Everyone at our table was feeling great. To be dressed in such beautiful, feminine attire in one of the most spectacular dining rooms I had ever seen among 750 other passengers, was a dream come true. I pinched myself many times during the cruise. Yes, it was possible to crossdress with dignity and find acceptance and support from complete strangers!
After dinner we quickly returned to our room to touch up our makeup and prepare for the nightly Las Vegas type show in the showroom. Again as we walked to our seats in the showroom no one seemed to be ready to start a drive to throw those crazy crossdressers overboard. Certainly the crew was not threatening mutiny because they had to serve those "men in dresses." In fact most persons perceived our group to be a dignified group of ladies out for a wonderful adventure. We seemed to be getting better service than many of the other passengers. The one hour show with gorgeous show girls, beautiful songs, a magician and two of the funniest comics I have ever seen, was as good as any show in Vegas. After the show I walked Peggy to our room, tucked her in for the night and was off to the casino to meet the new hosts of the casino, our own Michelle and Robin. I stopped into the Carousel Lounge for a drink with several of our group. Since you have to pass through the lounge to get to the casino, there were hundreds of passengers who did a double take as they walked past our table. Some stopped to talk with us with the usual questions we receive, one or two made caustic remarks but the majority just smiled and walked past.
As I walked into the casino I quickly saw Michelle and Robin at one of the six blackjack tables. There were probably 50 people crowding around their table. Michelle and Robin were in rare form. Michelle kept telling the dealer to deal out that blackjack to her so she could buy that new dress she wanted. She had the crowd of beautifully dressed women and their husbands or boyfriends dying laughing and enjoying every minute of the continuing blackjack game. I decided to rejoin them later at the table when the crowd was smaller. Melanie was dying to play blackjack when the table had a vacant spot. I bought a $10 roll of quarters and sat down at a quarter machine between two younger women who were with their husbands or boyfriends. We talked about their lack of winnings. I did not detect even a whisper of question in their minds about this woman sitting next to them. I was just another well dressed, middle aged woman having a good time in the casino. One of the husbands noticed my wedding ring and asked if my husband was also in the casino. I replied that he had turned in early. The man told the others that there was a group of crossdressers at the blackjack table. I did not comment.
I had almost run through my 40 quarters when I hit triple 7's - a jackpot of 500 quarters. Now there were 50 people or more standing around me watching the commotion as the 500 quarters quickly filled the tray. Again no questions or comments from anyone except about my winnings. By the way, the next day when we were visiting the casino at Freeport I hit triple 7's again - this time for $600! Now I had plenty of money for blackjack. At about 1 AM I began playing blackjack. An older gentleman welcomed me to the table shared by Michelle, Robin and one of the couples from their dining room table. (All passengers eat all meals in the dining room at the same table with the same people unless a request is made to the Maitre de to move.) After introductions were made my new friend ordered me a drink and I bought into the game with $30 in chips. I asked the couple and the other man at our table their response to our group. They agreed that they thought our expression of our feminine personas was fantastic. The woman said it was obvious we were very secure with our masculinity and we made great looking women. She joked with her husband that she was going to buy him a dress. He didn't comment. At 3 AM I called it a night and returned to my room. I quickly removed my makeup and changed into a black lacy gown for a few hours sleep.
At 7 AM the next morning we quickly dressed into our casual clothes and went to the deck for coffee, rolls and orange juice. We were docked at Freeport in the Bahamas. I need to point out that most of us on the cruise with the exception of Virginia, Jheri and Cynthia dressed in boy drag during the day. I had compromised with Peggy that I would be Melanie at night but Mel during the day. Also in the tropics it was too hot and humid to attempt makeup during the day. Some of our group did not even dress every night of the cruise. This was each person's choice.
After breakfast several of us left the ship to explore the International Bazaar in Freeport and the Princess Casino where I hit another jackpot. We later returned to the ship for lunch. After a nap we began to change for dinner. That night I wore a beautiful multi color skirt Peggy had purchased in Freeport while I was trying to pay for the trip in the casino. The fuchsia, silk blouse I wore with the skirt made this outfit stunning.
Before dinner we met members of our group for a drink in the lounge. As we walked among the other passengers it was becoming obvious that most on board had begun to figure out that we were a group of crossdressers with wives and other significant others. Some sneered, but most were very friendly and did a lot of smiling. I interpreted the smiles to be a sign of nervousness. Again that night we shared a wonderful dinner with our group, who by this time had all changed to the late sitting with us. They were seated at a table near by. Danny, my stepson, was at the table when we arrived. He looked at Melanie and expressed his approval. Soon Jane came over to our table and asked if Melanie was ready to meet her parents. Jane had prepared them for meeting me. My knees were shaking as I walked to their table. My mother's first response was that Melanie looks like her cousin. My father said I looked nice in my skirt and blouse. There were tears in my eyes as I hugged both of them. This was another big event in Melanie's life. My parents did not have any problems meeting and accepting Melanie. They later told me they had never met a finer group of people than our group. They want to go on the next Dignity cruise in 1992. When my parents saw the photos taken on the cruise my mother remarked that Melanie looked very much like herself.
After a wonderful dinner of prime rib and another sinful dessert we were off for the show in the showroom. We were again entertained for one hour by a cast of 30 who danced, sang love songs, provided magic acts and our two favorite comics. After tucking Peggy in (she turns to a pumpkin at midnight), I was off to join our other group members in the casino. Michelle and Robin were at the craps table. Michelle was the shooter with 30 or more bystanders wishing her luck. As she shot the dice she told the crowd that she needed to pay for those new heels to go with the dress she won last night. She had everyone on the floor holding their sides. She told the guys at the table that if they wanted to play they had to go put on a dress - this was an all girls table. For the next hour I visited with Janet from our group and some of the other passengers who wanted the real story of who we were. As always the same questions from the passengers but lots of support and acceptance. One woman made the remark, "I wish I could get my husband to crossdress. You gals are better men because you can cross over into our world. He can't communicate with me." I played the slots for around an hour and after losing $20 decided to call it a night.
The next morning the ship was at the Nassua pier. After breakfast Peggy, her son and I left the ship and took a taxi to the Paradise Island Resort and Casino. Peggy and I had stayed at this resort in 1983 and wanted to relive our wonderful experiences. We had tropical drinks at the bar near the beach and watched the parasailers climb hundreds of feet into the air. We returned to the resorts huge casino where I lost $30 of my prior winnings. As was true during all days I was wearing comfortable, cool boy drag. We returned to the ship for lunch. Since tonight was the Captain's party and formal dinner we wanted to take extra time dressing. I wore a long blue skirt and blue top with lots of beads and bangles. Other than looking like I needed to lose 30 pounds the image I saw in the full length mirror was presentable. Peggy wore a long black skirt and black top also with lots of sparkle beads.
The pre-dinner Captain's party was held in the showroom. Everyone was dressed in their finest attire. Most of the women wore long gowns or skirts. Many of the men wore tuxedos. As I walked into the room past the Captain and other ship's officers, I felt like I was on top of the world. I had before only dreamed about being dressed in glamorous clothing at a formal affair. I have worn the same clothing at our gender communities annual formal affairs but tonight was different. I was a woman among hundreds of other beautifully dressed women. My head began to swell when our waiter and other passengers told me how they liked my outfit. If this night could only last a lifetime!
Our formal dinner in the dining room was beyond all our expectations. The flash bulbs of hundreds of cameras went crazy as we walked into the dining room. After visiting with my parents at their table and showing them my outfit for the night (they approved), I visited with Michelle and Robin at their table. I had heard about Robin's sequinned gown which weighs 30 pounds and Michelle's new gown. They both looked great. I took pictures of everyone at their table and visited with the three couples at their table. All three of these couples agreed that meeting all of us was the best thing they had ever experienced. I returned to our table and more pictures and 8 courses of wonderful food. The waiters all dressed in tuxedos left the tables at the end of the 6th course and to the sounds of the ship's orchestra marched down the isles carrying flaming baked Alaska on their heads. What a wonderful experience we all had that night. Words cannot express how we all felt. I think even Virginia Prince was touched. Virginia as you may imagine spent most of her time on the cruise outreaching with the other passengers. By the end of the cruise many of the 2500 passengers and crew had met and talked with Virginia. She told our story well!
After dinner I changed into a more comfortable skirt and blouse with lower heeled pumps and walked with Peggy to the top deck of the ship where a party was beginning. There was a band playing the typical music of the Bahamas, and a huge buffet was set for the midnight buffet. How could anyone from the 8:30 PM late seating for dinner even think about eating again at the midnight buffet? We sat on loungers, listened to the music and sipped our tropical drinks. Peggy and I visited with Janet and Cynthia from our group until midnight when Peggy did her usual disappearing act. Janet and I talked for another hour and also visited with some of the other passengers. We returned to the Carousel Lounge where many of our group were gathered. We talked and enjoyed our femininity together until closing time for the bar. The casino was closed for the night since we remained in Nassua until 4 AM.
The next morning found us anchored one mile off the private island owned by Royal Caribbean Cruise Lines. After breakfast Peggy and I boarded a smaller boat for the ride to the island. The island is a tropical paradise with thacked huts, a beautiful beach and several restaurant areas. After a very severe 30 minute storm had passed we put on our snorkeling equipment and headed for the waters. For the next hour we explored the bright coral and many fish swimming in the shallow water. Swimming worked up a ferocious appetite and we were ready for the bar-b-que served by the ship's chefs on the beach. In the early afternoon we returned to the ship to dress for our last big night at sea.
That night I wore a colorful skirt and blouse with white pumps. Before dinner we gathered for cocktails in the suite of two of our group. Their suite was breathtaking. There was a large open air veranda at the end of the suite. You could easily fit 20 people on this veranda - much larger than our room. In addition to our group the three couples from Robin and Michelle's table joined in for our celebration in the suite and outdoors. We visited for the next 1 1/2 hour with our new friends. These couples want to go on the next cruise with our group!
At dinner we passed out envelopes with our gratuity to our crew for the best service any of us had ever experienced. There were lots of hugs, lots of tears and more pictures as we said our formal goodbyes to the crew, other passengers and other members of our group. After dinner we had a group picture made on the stairs on the main floor of the ship. As we posed for the ship's photographer we noticed that many of the passengers were also taking their own group picture of us. Later that night and the next morning we gathered at the photography gallery to view the numerous pictures taken of our group by the ship's photographer. We were told that some copies of pictures of our group had been purchased by other passengers. Guess they wanted to show the folks back home in Podunk, Arkansas pictures of those gorgeous men in dresses.
Again we closed down the casino that night. At 3 AM most of the passengers and crew still in the casino lined up to tell Michelle, Robin and I goodbye and tell us how much it meant for them to meet us. Do you know how it feels to have men who were complete strangers, hug you, kiss you on the cheek and tell you that they will be better men because they met and interacted with you - a crossdresser. That is real outreach to that big world outside of our community! Michelle and Robin should win the outreach award of the year for this cruise. I learned a lot just being around them.
The next morning as we gathered to leave the ship I overheard two couples talking about their best experience of the cruise. Both couples agreed that meeting members of our group was the highlight of the trip for them. One made the comment, "Those people really know how to have a good time. They may wear dresses but they have their heads screwed on better than most men." They did not recognize me in my boy drag but inside I smiled with pride.
In retrospect the greatest value of our first experience on Dignity Cruise I was the feeling of personal dignity and the respect which was so visible. Peggy when she completed her second book, CROSSDRESSING WITH DIGNITY, pondered the issue of public acceptance and asked the question, "How do we, as individuals and as a highly organized body of kindred spirits, move beyond ourselves and into the world? This cruise was an avenue to make this happen. We found that we could move out into a beautiful atmosphere and move among beautiful people with acceptance and support. Virginia Prince after her experience on this cruise made the following statement, "Are we prepared to accept acceptance?" On Dignity Cruise I we found acceptance, support and lots of love from perfect strangers - many of whom may become lifelong friends.
Come join us on Dignity Cruise II sailing September, 1992 for Alaska. We have 20 rooms reserved on the Costa Cruise Line ship, mtsDaphne. This is a yacht type ship with only 417 passengers sailing for 7 days from Vancouver up the Alaska inland passage. Can you believe that on the ship they have a male nightgown contest scheduled one night. Guess who will win - one of our group. For more information on Dignity Cruise II write to:
Dr. Peggy Rudd
P.O. Box 5304
Katy, TX 77491
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