October 2002

Masthead 2002

Minutes from September's  meeting

October  Meal

Monte Carlo Night
A Note from Michelle
A Public Service Message
Play At Karamu
Ins and Outs of Chapter Life
A Message from National
Upcoming National Events
Cartoon
Upcoming Events

MINUTES FOR SEPTEMBER:

Meeting called to order at 7:50

In October, we will have Monte Carlo and Halloween costumes. Gifts for Monte Carlo and for best costume.

Found place to rent games, Black Jack, $50.00, Roulette, $50.00, Dice $75.00, $429.00 for them to do, but we will do it to save money. Gift Certificates for prizes. Also see about promotional items for gifts. Raffle at end of night

Food:

Sandwiches, snacks, veggies, buffalo wings (Abby), Karen brings bread,  DF bring hors d’oerves, Sheila brings pizza, DK candy corn, Michelle brings snacks, Debbie does tarot card readings ($10.00) each, officers will be costume judges.

Next meeting will be Oct 12, 7:00pm, games start at 8:00pm till 11:00 or later, friends can come, but with a member.

November will be speech therapist.

December will be roast beef, turkey and salad.

Michelle discussed website move and possible online store

The chapter wants to create a members only section on the web site.

Diane Kent will bring photography equipment to October meeting for pictures of costumes and more glamour shots

9:05 Karen moved to Adjourn, Diane Frank seconded.Return to Contents

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On Saturday, October 12^th, Alpha Omega is putting on a "Monte Carlo Night". It will be an evening of games, Food, fun, costumes, and prizes. It will be a Las Vegas setting and food served buffet style. It will also double as our Costume Party, with prizes for the best costume. We would like to extend an invitation to members of other groups to join us for the Gala.

As is normal, our regular meeting place would be open about 6, with the food being a buffet ready about 7:30-8:00. Shortly thereafter we will start the gaming.

Of course there will some glitz and glam, as one would expect in a casino style setting, but we do ask that everyone use good judgment and dress classy and tastefully. There will be many guests, so we want to make sure to give a good impression.

The cost per person will be $12.00 to everyone, Guests and members alike. Gaming "chips" will be purchased at the cashier. Prizes will be awarded for most money won, most likely in 3 places. There may even be a few surprises~!

We would appreciate some RSVP’s for our planning. This can be done by calling our help line at 216-556-0067, or emailing one of us directly, or by using the Alpha Omega Address.

Contact us @ info@triess-Alpha Omega.org., or email Abby @ ACD1997@AOL.com

We look forward to seeing you all~!

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With music and lyrics by McKinley Johnson and Stephanie Newsom

There are many things about Being Beautiful that remain stuffed in the back of Afton Cousins’ closet…that is …until tonight…when all the secrets are "dragged" out.  Being Beautiful, set in the parlor of Afton Cousins home, begins in 1970 at the family’s traditional New Year’s Eve dinner table.  While her mother- Bernice is out of the room, Jena probes Afton- her uncle, for information on his former life in the thirties and forties as a female impersonator.  And then….                    

This new African-American musical comedy brings laughter to Karamu’s 2002/2003 Theatre Season Opening Production.  It features fifteen jazz production numbers with a four piece musical ensemble.   Being Beautiful utilizes the talents of director/choreographer Reggie Kelley and Dr. J LanYe’ as Musical Director.      Take time to come out and laugh!

For Ticket information and availability please call  Karamu’s box office at  (216) 795-7070 ext 226

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By Jane Ellen Fairfax

The diversity of needs in a Tri-Ess chapter is enough to give its leaders fits! Some sisters enjoy programs on developing their feminine presentation, while others find such programs boring, and prefer seminars on political activism. Singles want programs directed at them. Wives want programs that allow them to express their needs and help them integrate crossdressing into their relationships. But of all the many needs apparent in Tri-Ess chapters, none pose more of a conundrum than the conflict between those who want the meetings to be held in secure places (the "Ins") and those who enjoy going out in public (the "Outs"). The problem is not so much the varying needs, but rather, the intolerance the "Ins" and "Outs" display toward each other.

For the "Ins," security is the all-important consideration. Frequently they are prominent in their professions and local communities, and they fear the consequences of discovery and exposure. Sensitive, they wish to avoid hurtful comments from those who "read" them. Not for them the bar scene, or "hanging ten" by gadding about in the public eye. Some have gathered all their courage in order to simply go out of their houses to the relatively sheltered atmosphere of a Tri-Ess chapter. When they hear talk from the "Outs" to the effect that everyone should be out in public, they are horrified. Some perceive the "Outs" as a threat to their peace of mind because they feel constantly prodded past their comfort zone. "Why," they argue, "don’t the ‘Outs’ just leave our chapter alone, go out and do their thing, and leave us to do ours?"

The "Outs" feel no such qualms. They believe that the worst fear is that of fear itself. Usually, they have had pleasant experiences out in public. Even when they are "read," they are gratified when people accept them, knowing they are men expressing an inner femininity. They dismiss derogatory comments, realizing that it is the detractors who have the problem. "If only more of these ‘Ins’ would realize how much more fun the chapter could be if the group went out in public more! Think of the opportunities for reaching out and educating the public!" To the "Outs" the sheltered atmosphere of the chapter is nothing more than "a bigger closet," and a pretty dull place. Often, "Outs" consider themselves somehow "more advanced" than the "Ins," and  are impatient to bring the "Ins" "up" to their level.

Both viewpoints have a certain amount of validity. Both "Ins" and "Outs" have valuable contributions to make to chapter life. It is true that going out in public is a lot less traumatic than it first appears. When one is able to enjoy a variety of exper-iences out in public, one’s feminine life does become richer. On the other hand, security considerations are very real for many, and it is wrong to blithely dismiss them. The "Ins" inject a note of caution, and tone down the tendency to recklessness apparent in some who are "Out." The question is how to bring the "Ins" and "Outs" together.

As usual, the solution entails two parts empathy and one part creativity. Each faction should try to understand the needs of the other, and accept each other as "OK." A productive exercise is for each group to try to think of ways to make the chapter more fulfilling for the other. Perhaps people who are "Out" can conduct a course on feminine presentation for those who do not feel comfortable about venturing into the public. Alpha Zeta Chapter of Arizona has such a course, which is offered outside the time of the main meeting. The novices are free to drink up the knowledge, and even the grizzled veteran can glean something new if her mind is receptive. Those who do not consider these basic programs interesting can enjoy the events that follow.

Some members who are particularly empathic can come up with some amazingly wonderful ideas. In one chapter, a sister who is very much out and about offers her home for small dinner parties, inviting sisters who are just emerging. She has a very fulfilling time exercising her femininity by creating gourmet meals and entertaining at her home, which is in an isolated location and offers no security risks for timid sisters. The reviews of these classy "evenings out" have been ecstatic!

The "Ins" do well to consider carefully ways in which they can stretch their horizons a little without daredeviling. This is where the chapter government can help. By seeking out restaurants where the group can go after a meeting, they can find a surprising number of places that are crossdresser-friendly. Having a waiter address her as a lady can really build the self-esteem of an "In," and light-hearted girl talk at a post-meeting dinner is fun!

Some "Ins" have a tendency to be a bit judgmental of some "Out" activities. Certainly the bars are not everybody’s thing. But they are legitimate fun for many, providing entertainment and the opportunity to meet other people.  Some find the smoke or noise bothersome. These should graciously refrain from attending, and avoid condemning those who do.  If chapter leaders are willing to dig, they can find some wonderful meeting places that are out in public, but do not risk members’ security. Some salons will stay open and provide "an evening of beauty." Why not have meetings at a Merle Norman makeup center? Or a sympathetic dress shop or lingerie emporium? Both "Ins" and "Outs" will enjoy shopping in this public, yet secure, atmosphere.

Both "Ins" and "Outs" have valuable contributions to make to the life of a Tri-Ess chapter. By mutual caring, each can maximize the good they can do for their chapter and for themselves. And that’s the feminine way!

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*****A LETTER FROM NATIONAL*****Dear Colleagues and Friends,

Upcoming events

Fantasia Fair, Provincetown, MA  10/20-27   www.fantastiafair.orn

En Femme Getaway, Eureka Springs, AR 11/6-9  www.femmegetaway.com

Paradise in the Poconos, 11/6-9 www.cdspub.com/poco.html

Lake Erie Gala 2002, Erie, PA 11/21-24

Holiday En Femme, Tenafly, NJ  11/7-10

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Cartoon

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