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You have reached the Newsletter Archives of the Alpha
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explore our website click on the button labeled "Home". La Femme Silhouette September 2000 Minutes Resources- Asians and Friends Speaking from the Heart S.O. Interview Newsletter Announcement Dumping Doctor Laura
Alpha Omega Minutes September 9th 2000
President Diane Brennan called the meeting to order. Treasurers Report: balance in the checking is 42659.35. $577.48 of this is Outreach. There is $50 Petty cash. Candy has been doing our Web Site. We voted to send her a check for $235 to compensate for past services and for assistance in moving our web domain to GeoCities. Diane Frank is going to do our new brochure. There will be a informal dinner at Snickers on September 23rd. Diane Frank and Paula are handling the arrangements. The National directory is going to be on CD ROM. October 6th. Boy George is going to be performing at the Akron Civic Center. We decided to donate the proceeds of our auction to the Auora Defense fund. This child wants to be a girl. Diane Frank met the parents of this child at Trans Family. This child was taken away from the parents. Diane Frank made a motion the chapter donate the proceeds of the charity auction to the defense fund. .Paula sec. motion passed. Diane Brennan moved that the chapter donate an additional $100 from the outreach fund. Motion passed. Ari talked about the article in the news letter by Jane Ellen. Dana from National will be our speaker next meeting. The November meeting will be the first Saturday and the Christmas party will be the first Saturday in December. Lori introduced the new people here tonight. Michelle, Helen and Rebecca. Linda is interviewing people for the new letter. Those who have e-mail she would like to have your address or phone number so she can get the questions to you. Paula did the 50/50 raffle. Helen won and donated it to the Aurora defense fund. With no further business the meeting was adjourned. Respectfully Submitted Elaine Benton Secretary/Treasurer SPEAKING FROM THE HEART - INAUGURAL MEETING
On Sept. 9, 2000, "Speaking From the Heart" made its debut with eight members participating. Present were Diane V., Lori, Marissa, Michelle, Jamie, Linda, Joyce, and Karen. The meeting began at 6:15 and concluded at 7. The group sat in a circle, and the sharing that took place was personal and authentic. It was a nice reminder of how much we have to share, and learn from the insights of others. The meeting ended with the group standing, and sharing the group energy as we held hands in our appreciation of the past few minutes. Several others have mentioned that they will be there for the next session. (Oct. 14) Thanks to all who attended the first meeting, and a sincere invitation to all who wish to join us next month. Namaste, Joyce
Mail Lists and Confidentiality
"Alpha Omega and Tri-ess rules require that every effort be made to protect members privacy and confidentiality. For that reason we restrict access to mailing and email addresses to certain club officers. We have a one-list email system for members only which you can sign up for by personally contacting Cheryl. Diane Frank, our web-mistress does NOT have access to the email addresses of member unless she is given them by the members. Among other things that Diane does is post the newsletter on the web site. If you want to be notified when the newsletter is posted, PLEASE either sign up for the one list with Cheryl or give Diane your email address. Diane can be contacted at dsfrank@hotmail.com . She will email the newsletter to interested parties as well as posting notices." This is a reminder that newsletter articles are now due THE DAY OF THE MEETING. To avoid any delays in the newsletter it will now be sent out 2 weeks before the meeting. Thanks- Ari SUMMARY: Canadian TV is kissing anti-gay talk show host "Dr. Laura" Schlessinger goodbye, but it wasn't her fiendish political enemies that drove her out -- just the absence of an audience. Canadian TV viewers will see the last of anti-gay talk show host "Dr. Laura" Schlessinger on October 6. Schlessinger was a victim of her own low ratings, Canadian syndicator WIC announced on October 5. The TV show had only debuted in Canada on September 18, but WIC/Global abandoned hope that the show might somehow rebound from drawing less than 0.5% of households in Ontario and British Columbia, less than one-third of the audience that had been anticipated. Thus far, months of activists' lobbying, demonstrations, and pressure on advertisers has failed to dislodge Schlessinger from a single station in the U.S., although the New York Daily News reported that low ratings have driven CBS flagship station WCBS-New York to give serious consideration to moving Schlessinger to a late-night slot. Speaking for CanWest Global, head of programming Roy Gardner explained that, "Our audience has voted, and unfortunately they've cast a 'nay' ballot for Dr. Laura on television. ... Essentially, you can't have a show on the air if nobody watches it." Like many critics, Gardner suggested that Schlessinger may have gone too far in trying to tone down her abrasive radio manner, saying, "I think that [lack of controversy] may have been part of its problem. I think the show may have been bland ... because she was being so careful not to offend anyone. It didn't have a hook." Schlessinger's radio show has enjoyed some of the same popularity in Canada that kept it at the top of U.S. ratings. However earlier this year the Canadian Broadcast Standards Council, the industry watchdog, delivered one of the most scathing critiques Schlessinger has ever received, labeling her "abusively discriminatory" in breach of the national broadcasting code for her descriptions of gays and lesbians as "deviant," "a biological error," "abnormal," "aberrant," "disordered," and "dysfunctional." There are allegations that Schlessinger's TV product is not only boring but dishonest. Alerted by the Gay and Lesbian Alliance Against Defamation (GLAAD) monitoring team, the New York Post reported that a researcher for the show, San-D Duchas, appeared as a phony guest on two consecutive programs, first ostensibly as a college student paid by athletes to attend classes and take notes, then in a show about unmarried couples living together. While it's not unheard of for a staff member of a show to appear in a broadcast, they are usually identified as such. Producer Paramount has yet to comment. StopDrLaura.com now counts more than 70 advertisers who have officially abandoned Schlessinger's shows, and its Canadian counterpart, DrLauraGoHome.com, counts 46 more there. According to an article in Broadcast and Cable, the CBS owned-and-operated stations that make up most of Schlessinger's TV broadcasters are definitely feeling the pinch, but contracts have them locked into carrying the show for a full year (two years for some stations). A few shows have succeeded after surviving weak opening ratings and reluctant advertisers -- Jerry Springer for instance -- but October is expected to be the month that will make or break the future of Schlessinger's TV show. A representative of the show loyally declared, "We believe Dr. Laura will be part of the long-term TV landscape."
By Cheryl Do you realize it is October already? Where did summer go? The only time we made it to the beach was in Castaway Cay and although I used plenty of sunscreen, I still managed to get a little red. Our honeymoon was great. Even though Lisa was a little under the weather the whole time, she still managed to play jokes on our cabin steward. We had purchased in Disney World a huge Eeyore for Brendan. The first evening on board the Wonder, we had life drill. Even Eeyore was not happy wearing his life jacket especially since we left him in it until the next day. He sulked and spent the day on the couch wearing my glasses and reading the ship newsletter. Poor Eeyore….that was not the worst. We sent him to bed and he in turn decided to celebrate the last night of the cruise. Our steward found him on the floor, crossdressed in Lisa’s shortie nightgown, his head in the wastebasket, a mug on one paw and an empty wine bottle on the floor. The sight must have astonished him since he had the other stewards in to see this poor overhung donkey! Needless to say, Eeyore made it home to Brendan’s loving arms. We almost missed the bad weather. The ship left dock early the first night so that we would get ahead of the storm. It was rainy and windy that night but beautiful the rest. The food was fantastic and I certainly could get used to being waited on hand and foot. Hmmmmmmm…maybe I’ll get Lisa that maid’s outfit yet. In purple……..grin. We certainly plan on going again some time but next year is Hawaii. We definitely need to take advantage of a certain Marine son being stationed there. Now it is time to see what is in store for A-O. This month is National Officer’s Month. Our guest will be Dana. If you haven’t met Dana, you certainly are in for a treat. Dana is a whirlwind of energy focusing on National’s outreach. Besides attending conventions, etc. Dana speaks to the youth in colleges throughout the nation. His methods are honest, forthright and very interesting. I know you all will enjoy listening to what he has to share with us. December is our Christmas Party – a time of celebration and anticipation. Will the reknown A-O author Gloria have another masterpiece for us? One can only wait and see. Will Peggy feed us until we burst? The New Year is full of events. February is SO month. Any ideas? How about July? It’s our chapter that is hosting SPICE. What are we doing for a reception and what about afternoon outings? Joyce has graciously volunteered (after I begged) for her and Linda to demonstrate their dancing prowess one night. Any ideas for the other nights? I know the A-O SPICE committee will be looking for volunteers, right Diane? In closing, I wish peace for everyone Cheryl When did you first realize your SO was a cross dresser? How were you told? On our third date I discovered it quite by accident. He never did come out and say the words cross dresser to me and I hadn't ever heard of such a thing. How did you handle this realization? I went into denial and thought I could change all the things that I didn’t like about him. (Hey, I was young) Did you share this news with others? No, but I wish I could have, it may have been easier to handle. Does your family know of your SO's CDing? NO! And they never will if we have anything to say about it. They are set in their ways and couldn’t handle such a big change. What was your biggest obstacle as the partner of a CD? Realizing that it is still the man I married under all the other stuff. If you had only one sentence of advise to give to other SOs, what would that be? Be patient. How long have you been a member of Alpha Omega? Since June of 2000. Do you regularly attend AO meetings? Yes, haven’t missed one yet but I know in the future we may not be able to make them all. What do you enjoy most about the meetings? Once I get relaxed, I just have fun. I like seeing everyone. What ideas do you have on how the meetings might be improved for SOs? I'd say to get more of the SOs to attend but not everyone can accept it and we can’t really force it on anyone. How long have you been with your CD? We've been together 18 years, and married for 16 of those. What arrangement has worked best for you and your CD (in regards to Cding)? We are still getting there but open communication helps a great deal. 16. What is the biggest obstacle you have overcome as a SO of a CD? Just coming to terms that it wasn’t going away and letting it come out. And then seeing through the stuff to realize that it’s the same person. Are you involved in any other activities outside Alpha Omega as a CD and SO? (I.e., dining, shopping, etc. while your SO is "dressed"?) Not as yet but I know its right around the corner. I’m already nervous about it because of some of the other stories I’ve heard. What portion of your life together is committed to CDing? (i.e., 5%, >10%, >50%, etc.) I’d say about 10% right now, although Michelle would like it to be more. If family didn’t live so close it probably WOULD be more. What other hobbies and interests do you share as a couple? Camping and gardening are the major things. How has your attitude changed from the first time you knew about his CDing and now? Well, major change considering I’m no longer trying to deny that this is a part of the man I love. I think it has also brought me out of my shell. I don’t know if its just age or what but I don’t hold back now with telling people how I feel about things. It’s already got me into hot water since people are used to me being a doormat. Thank-you for allowing this interview and your willingness to contribute and communicate your feelings and experiences as a SO of a CD. This sharing will help create a better understanding and awareness for Significant Others, CDs, their families and friends.
By Diane S. Frank (Author’s note: I have no particular order of priority I’m pursuing in this series. I would have liked to start off with a counselor, but I’m having trouble getting the article completed. ) Asians and Friends, a Cleveland GLBT support group. If you’re going to be a roving reporter, you have to be prepared to do just about anything for a story. So when Rollie Santos, (president of Asians and Friends), suggested that I would be the featured speaker for their Sunday meeting in Cleveland Heights, I knew I had to earn my keep. In exchange for learning about Asian Culture and how it reflects on GLBTs and cross-dressers, I would need to represent Alpha Omega. Fortunately, the old chestnut "unaccustomed as I am to public speaking" is NOT part of my phrase book. A&F is a six-year-old support and social group for Gay, Lesbian, Bi-sexual and Transgendered Asians and well yes their friends. A&F is very careful to make sure that its leadership remains Asian. This particular meeting was a joint meeting with Black and White together, a support group for African-American and White Gays and their partners. This was therefore a rather diverse group racially, and in age and background also. Professionals, blue-collar workers and retirees were all present and accounted for. Although the group considers itself a GLBT group, it has only one woman member. There are several Trans-gendered members including Cindy, who being an accountant by profession and very presentable (understatement) is also the group’s treasurer. Although Cindy has long known she was gay, she didn’t try cross-dressing until a couple of years ago. Her success was so spectacular that she spends about 40% of her non-working hours en femme. Not all Asian cultures were represented at this meeting…significant absences included Japan and India. But after talking with a number of members from Asian countries, I heard a consistent story, with a couple of notable exceptions. In most Asian countries, any trans-gendered statement results in the person being pushed into the gay community. The idea of heterosexual cross-dressing would be very novel in the context of most Asian Cultures. Most cross-dressing occurs in the context of entertaining or prostitution. Despite the repression of homosexuality in many Asian countries, it is far more common to see men touching in public and sharing housing. According to Filipino Rollie Santos, however, in the Philippines a different story emerges. There is a class of males called Babailan, (a term I had previously associated with the notorious Filipino psychic surgeons), who have a distinct role in Philippine society. They lead female lives, holding women’s jobs and rarely marrying. They often serve as primary caretakers for nieces and nephews and their own parents as they age. For carnivals, parades and feast days Babailan often serve as ritual figures, substituting in public display for women, whose modesty would presumably forbid such visibility. In another exception to the general notion of repression, one person from Beijing insisted that the PRC is actually a very good place to be gay. He asserted that in China there is no gay bashing and no official notice is taken of gay bars and other social gathering places. He did note that sex in public was prohibited. The expulsion of Western influence in the 1920’s is to what he attributed the PRC’s open stance. I need to note that I related this narrative to other Asian’s and they were somewhat startled by it. There may be more to this story. I met several other attendees, who all seemed to want to tell me their story. I hadn’t realized I was such a sympathetic listener before. Perhaps it was the dress I was wearing. One African-American man, a part-time radio announcer and autoworker wanted to be sure that people knew about the efforts being made in the African-American gay community to encourage safe sex. He also confirmed previous information indicating how hard the African American community is on its gay members, and also on cross-dressers. Anything that would appear to make a black male look weak to "the man" is frowned upon. For my part, I held up a copy of "The Globe", a tabloid where most of American gets its information. I read excerpts from a story about Kelsey Grammer, the star of Frazier, in which an alleged ex-fiancé alleged that Kelsey was a fetishistic cross-dresser, "a very sad and disturbed individual". I pointed out that this public image of cross-dressing was at odds with the truth and explained about how our organization aims to provide a safe social forum and support group for CDs and spouses. I noted that as gays they were in the position of having some straight friend "come out" to them and now they could help direct their friend to the right place. And we in turn can safely recommend this group for people to whom it is appropriate as a friendly, thoughtful, warm and welcoming place. Author’s Note: In doing some research to verify some of the accounts presented to me at the meeting I came across the following web site: <http://hivinsite.ucsf.edu/topics/apis/2098.23b8.html> The focus of this site is to describe cultural barriers to preventing the spread of HIV in Asian countries. Rollie’s account of the Babaylan is supported here, with a general tolerance in the Philippines of trans-gendered males: In pre-Spanish Philippines, the matriarchal society mirrored many of the value systems found in Native American cultures before their colonization. Society is categorized by roles and the expected acts that are aligned to those identities. Many tribes designated women, called catalonan, as heads of their communities; they performed executive and legislative duties that united and led tribal life. Her counterpart, the babaylan, functioned as the spiritual link to the deities of native animist religions; this role is generally assigned to men who "have the hearts of women." Today, it is generally accepted that these men correlate to the Native American berdache and played a significant role in tribal life (Williams, 1986). They have historically been associated with spirituality because they are perceived as the manifestation of both the male and female psyche. With the arrival of the Spanish colonists, the Christianization process of the islands began with the widespread destruction of native society. The babaylan's role as spiritual leader ceased as the Spanish colonists condemned them for their perceived allegiances with the devil and as perpetrators of pagan religion. Sodomy and fellatio, defined as a non-reproductive act, was treated as a mortal sin that was punishable by death. Henceforth in the name of conquest, the babaylan were systematically tortured and killed for their demeanor and observed homosexual encounters (Phelan, 1959). This cultural destruction establishes the beginnings of modern Filipino society's views of homosexual behavior as a sociological, biological, and psychological anomaly. Much of the Spanish value system of machismo is inherited in the sociocultural environment, creating a dichotomization of sexual role preference among men-who-have-sex-with-men. At present, significant community differences exist between groups that make up the Filipino men-who-have-sex-with-men subculture. Larger Filipino society tends to accept and tolerate the bakla (or effeminate male) as the representative homosexual persona. Characterized by stereotypical patterns of behavior, the bakla are socially assigned to specific functions and roles. They provide the laughable caricature in mass media and are expected to play the part of arbiters of taste (Roces and Roces, 1985). Society has supported this role identity by encouraging baklas to enter professions in the arts, namely as coutiers, interior decorators, architects, and hair and make-up artists. These feminized roles are reinforced by the bakla's identification with "the female heart." In fact, the term bakla literally means "half man, half woman," and is formed as the combination of babae (woman) and lalaki (man). "Lalaki ako, pero tutuong babae ang aking puso (I am a man, but one with the heart of a real woman)" serves as an explanation (or an excuse) for the bakla's behavior. In his subtle way, the bakla has communicated to the mainstream society that his orientation and identity is innate and biological. This identification with the female is initially formed by the lack of a referent group. That is because baklas do not behave in the traditional manner that men do or participate in machismo, society has left them to identify more closely with the alternative identity, as woman. The dual identity of woman-in-a-man operates within a set position in the larger social structure where roles and expected behaviors are clearly defined. Because it is generally believed that homosexuals are feminine males, society assumes that they have a preference for the receptive role in sexual encounters. This role is reconceptualized to fit into the bakla subculture where submission and subordination, as characterized by the ultrafeminine stereotype, is recreated as a cultural norm. Thus a self-fulfilling societal reinforcement of defining feminine males synonymously with unmanly homosexual behavior or the bakla identity becomes the criteria for the traditional social position of the man-who-has-sex-with-men. In other words, society tends to push feminine males toward exclusively homosexual behavior regardless of their sexual orientation and once the individual has self-identified as bakla, his feminine behavior is reinforced by that subculture. Baklas learn to behave like caricatures of women in order to become integrated into the larger society. In sexual situations, the bakla restrict their sexual repertoire within the passive role; primarily participating in sex as the passive/receptive partner and seldom, if ever, engaging in the active/insertive role. Baklas may use their feminine behavior to attract other men, but their purpose is fixed on serving the needs of their sexual partners. This behavior is not determined by larger society, but because Filipino society constrains the meaning of bakla, the individual is not given the freedom to create his own identity and operate in behaviors that reflect his concepts of self.
Closing ceremony of the Sydney Olympics is a drag.
by JOHN PYE Associated Press Writer SYDNEY, Australia (AP) via NewsEdge Corporation - The closing ceremony of the Sydney Olympics is going to be a drag. Cross-dressing drag queens will be part of the games' finale despite swelling controversy the move has sparked, ceremonies director Ric Birch said Wednesday. He called critics of the plan ``right-wing reactionaries.'' Including the men who wear outlandish dresses, wigs and makeup in the closing ceremony is justified and a ``part of one tiny section'' of the event, a tribute to universally acclaimed Australian films that include the 1994 hit ``The Adventures of Priscilla, Queen of the Desert,'' Birch said. The movie featured two drag queens and a transsexual driving a pink bus through Australia's Outback. Some of the participants in the closing ceremony will be dressed in original costumes from the film, including a bright, frill-necked lizard outfit. A report in Wednesday's Sydney Morning Herald sparked heated debate about the closing ceremony. The Rev. Fred Nile, a Christian Democrat politician, was opposed to including drag queens in the ceremonies and said allowing homosexual men to prance around dressed as women would be a national embarrassment. ``Drag queens do not truly represent our great Aussie culture at all,'' said Nile, who urged like-minded Australians to express their concerns to Sydney organizers. One caller to a talk radio station said he would trade his closing ceremony ticket after hearing the news, while conservative politicians condemned the idea. But Birch held firm that they will proceed as planned. ``For the right-wing reactionaries or whatever part of a community is outraged about it _ well, they're always going to be outraged,'' he said. Birch said the inclusion of drag queens also reflected one of Sydney's most colorful events, the Gay and Lesbian Mardi Gras, a gay pride march and street carnival that attracts hundreds of thousands of spectators each year. ``I'm not sure if (critics) noticed there is a gay Mardi Gras parade that takes place in Sydney watched by hundreds of thousands of Sydneysiders and which attracts a huge international contingent,'' Birch said. ``That's part of Sydney life whether they like it or not.'' Birch, who directed the opening ceremony at the 1992 Barcelona Olympics and was involved in the opener at Atlanta four years ago, said he was annoyed that constant leaks were wrecking what should be a surprise for the public. ``I'm really disappointed at the way the media is gleefully trying to expose the secrets that we call surprises,'' Birch told Australian Broadcasting Corp. radio. Birch categorized the closing ceremony as a celebration. ``Everyone knows (Olympic ceremonies) are massive cavalcades of color, movement and celebration,'' he said. ``Particularly the closing ceremony, which is essentially a huge party that celebrates 16 days where a host city has put on an extraordinary event.'' Olympics Minister Michael Knight said all the plans for the ceremonies had been approved by the board of the organizing committee. ``The closing ceremony runs for several hours and has a very different feel to opening ceremony _ it's a party,'' he said. ``The athletes are going to be on the field from the word go as part of this giant party celebration. The whole feel will be one of great celebration and fun.'' STRANGE STATE LAWS (from Tidbits) Tennessee:
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